The great military strategist Sun Tzu once said, “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.” In the battle against porn, knowing your triggers and the triggers around you is critical to victory. Therapists often use the acronym “HALT” to…
Search Results for: porn addicts
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Pastors and Porn: Why We Struggle and the Help We Need
For 31 years, I was a senior pastor of three churches, ranging in membership from 200 to 2,000. For every one of those 31 years, I struggled with sex addiction. I know firsthand that pastors struggle with porn and sex addiction at alarming rates. Despite repeated visits to multiple therapists,…
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What to Do if Your Husband Lies About Porn Use
You just caught your husband watching porn. And you felt it. The sinking feeling in your stomach. The stab across your chest when you saw what your husband was looking at. Maybe even the screaming void that wordlessly reminds you this wasn’t the first time. But when you try to confront…
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Trauma and Porn: The Potential Link
Have you ever wondered where addictions, like the compulsive use of pornography, come from? Why do some people get addicted to things that other people can do without ever getting addicted? It’s a good question, and it’s one that doesn’t have a simple answer. The research on addictions is growing,…
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The Right Way to Quit Porn
Is there a right or wrong way to quit porn? Actually, yes. You might have a sense of this if you’ve tried to stop before and failed. If that’s you, keep reading. What’s the worst way to try to quit porn? I’ve found a couple of contenders for the absolute…
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Start the Path to Victory With a Free Account
What were you doing in the year 2000? Maybe you weren’t even born. Many people fretted about the Y2K bug—a perceived computer coding problem that was supposed to wreak havoc on personal computers and online networks across the globe. Thankfully, that didn’t happen. Google was nearly two years old.…
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Talking Body Image: From Down Under
I was given an opportunity to talk to a group of counselors and pastors in Auckland, New Zealand. The title of my talk (and the video I presented) was Compassion. The theme was the effects of porn and other forms of sexual addiction on the wife of the user or…
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The Essential Reason Porn Is Wrong
Your web browser does not support iframes, which means that the video The Essential Reason Porn Is Wrong cannot play. Porn Is Wrong for Many Reasons There are many reasons why people say we should avoid pornography. Some, for instance, will point out that pornography is very addictive, that it warps…
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4 Ways Porn Kills Great Sex in Marriage
Porn makes promises it can’t keep, especially when it comes to hot sex in marriage. Porn won’t spice up your sex life, and it won’t make you a better lover. Science and psychology show that sharing porn with your spouse or having a secret affair with porn will mess up…
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If You Love Her, Tell Her the Truth
Consistently, wives of sex addicts share with me how the lies and secrets their husbands keep from them hurt more than the sexual acting out itself. I asked a few of these wives the question, “Why do the lying and secrets hurt so much more than the acting out?” Here…
