How do you stop watching porn? For some, pornography might seem like a harmless pastime, a not-too-serious guilty pleasure, or an embarrassing habit. But maybe you’re one of the many who have realized the devastating effects that porn has on your life and relationships. Maybe you feel trapped and like you can’t stop.
If you’re wondering how to quit, you’re not alone. Skim through the hundreds of comments below, and you’ll see. Quitting porn doesn’t have to be complicated, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. Read on to learn the best way to stop porn for good.
Dr. Weiss’ 6 Essential Steps to Quit Porn
If you want to stop looking at porn, it takes intentional work, and I encourage you to familiarize yourself with these six steps:
1. You need to want to stop watching porn.
2. You have to be willing to try quitting porn a different way.
3. You need to be brutally honest with another person.
4. You need to get rid of all your porn.
5. You also need to block porn from coming in.
6. You need a friend to help you stay on track.
Note from the editor: Since 2012, Dr. Weiss’ six essential steps for quitting porn have helped over a million people on their journey away from porn. We’ve had so many comments and follow-up questions on this article that we expanded on the original points to help you understand how to finally quit porn for good. Dr. Weiss’ original thoughts are included in each step.
Step 1: You need to want to stop watching porn.
“The first part to quitting porn is you really have to want to quit porn. You need to be sick and tired of porn and the sickness that it causes you in order to quit. If you are not committed, you will only be quitting until the next time you look. Deep inside you have to want to stop.” – Dr. Doug Weiss
Is your porn use really a problem?
If you feel like you’ve got porn under control and you can watch a little bit here and there without any problems, then chances are good that you don’t bother trying to quit. In fact, the most popular advice today will tell you that watching a little porn won’t hurt you. If that’s you, I recommend checking out these articles:
What are the signs of porn addiction?
Are you concerned that someone you love may have a porn addiction? Check out these posts for more help:
Even a little porn can cause problems, but porn addiction can wreak havoc. Here are some common signs that you may have an addiction:
- You spend lots of money on porn.
- Your porn use has escalated.
- You can’t stop thinking about porn.
- You experience withdrawal symptoms when you try to stop.
- You take risks, like watching porn at work.
For more, check out this article by licensed therapist Dr. Peter Kleponis, Am I Addicted to Porn?: 6 Symptoms of Porn Addiction.
Do you have a strong reason to quit?
People who quit porn are people who recognized their need to change. For some of us, it takes a life-shaking event, such as getting caught by a spouse. For others, it’s simply the desire for something better than the emptiness of porn.
You’ve got to understand that it’s a long-term commitment and keep your reasons for quitting in front of you. You’ve got to really want it so you can go on to step 2.
Understand the benefits of quitting porn.
Try visualizing your life without porn:
- Would your marriage be better?
- If you’re single, would you feel more confident to pursue a relationship?
- Would you find freedom from guilt and shame?
- Would you free up wasted time to pursue your dreams?
Make a giant list of every possible way you will benefit from quitting porn, and then post your top 1-3 reasons somewhere you’ll see it every day. To help you get started, we wrote a blog post on creating a unique list of how you’ll benefit from living porn-free.
When we turn to porn, it’s not always because we like porn itself. Some addicts hate pornography. But we want what porn promises: comfort for our loneliness, pleasure for our eyes, sexual fulfillment, etc. Don’t believe the lies. Porn won’t deliver what it promises you.
Step 2: You need to be willing to quit porn in a different way.
“You have to be willing to do things you haven’t done before. Seriously, if you keep trying to quit porn the same way, you’re likely to fail again. To stop for good, you have to give up what you’ve been doing and do what you have to do.” – Dr. Doug Weiss
Identify and manage your porn triggers.
To quit porn, you need to quit whatever it is that triggers you to watch porn. What are your vulnerable moments? Is it a particular TV show? Is it having your laptop and mobile phone next to your bed? Perhaps it’s having a computer/device without accountability software on it. Ask the following questions (better yet, have a close friend or ally ask you):
- What was I doing?
- What was I thinking?
- How was I feeling?
As you begin to find patterns in your temptation, you’ll need to create a game plan to navigate the vulnerable situations or avoid them altogether.
Educate yourself on the psychology of porn use.
When we understand the science of what’s happening with porn, it allows us to create a better plan. Learn about brain chemicals and porn.
Step 3: You need to be brutally honest with someone.
“You have to tell someone else about your struggle and desire to get free. This person may be a male friend, your wife, a person of clergy, a life coach, or a 12-step group person. Somebody has to know the truth about your porn usage for you to get and stay free.” – Dr. Doug Weiss
Porn plays on the power of secrecy and shame to trap people. We feel shame and embarrassment, which make us fearful of reaching out for the help we need. One of the biggest lies of porn is that you’re better off hiding your struggle than admitting to failure.
Confess your problem to someone.
Maybe you’ve followed the breadcrumbs and learned to recognize some of your triggers. But, you will not be free from your struggle with porn until you open up about it.
Get counseling or therapy.
Seeking professional help may feel scary or shameful. But speaking to a qualified counselor or sex addiction therapist can change your life. An expert will understand the root causes of porn addiction and help you walk through the steps of recovery.
We’ve written a post to help you find a Christian counselor or therapist.
Step 4: You need to get rid of all your porn.
“Next, you have to do what I call “clean house.” You have to get rid of the porn you have. Throw away the discs, magazines, anything you have used as pornography, and make sure to dump and clean out your computer. This is just a start; you have to clean house regularly. ” – Dr. Doug Weiss
In addition to Dr. Weiss’ suggestions, you may want to run a malware scanner and cleaning program. Porn sites are notoriously riddled with malware and adware that can stay with your computer after you delete the porn files and stop going to the websites. Depending on the type of sites you visited in the past (particularly sites that offered free downloads), you may need to take it to a computer repair shop for a professional tune-up.
Get rid of other triggering content too.
If you want to stop, it makes sense to get rid of your porn. But, you also need to get rid of any other content or media that triggers your porn use or is just unhelpful in your porn recovery journey.
Remember, in Question 2, we talked about identifying your porn triggers. If you identified any media habits that often precede porn use, stop using that type of media—maybe it’s certain music, shows, or social media in general. Just get rid of it. If you want to quit porn, you need to be intentional about all the types of media you consume.
You need to be honest about what’s triggering for you and be sure to put it aside. You may want to involve your ally in the process to help you make tough decisions as well as to keep you on track. You should also cultivate some new habits to help you stay away from porn.
Step 5: You need to block porn from coming back in.
A porn blocker alone won’t be enough to quit porn. But, a porn blocker can play an important role in your porn recovery journey, especially for those early in recovery or those deeply enmeshed in porn. Make it difficult to access porn! Dr. Weiss says:
“The next step is you have to block entry points. This means have a porn blocker and accountability software like Covenant Eyes on your phone, computer at home, and at the office. If you have people sending you compromising emails, block them. Unsubscribe from porn websites. You may have to decide if credit cards are a problem. You know how porn is coming into your life. If you had a gun to your head you could block entry points in a minute.”
Some people will ask someone to hold on to a tempting smartphone or computer for a time until their porn habit is better under control or other protections are in place. As with Step 4, the key here is being honest with yourself and your allies about where porn is coming into your life and then doing whatever it takes to remove access to it.
Too extreme? Remember Steps 1 and 2: How badly do you want to quit, and how willing are you to try something new to keep making progress on the journey?
Step 6: You need a friend to hold you accountable.
On a difficult journey, the people alongside you can determine your success or failure. And, if you look back over the previous five steps, you can see that you really need accountability for each one to make it stick. Accountability is the glue that holds your plan together.
Remember Step 1? You often need accountability to remind you of your reasons for quitting porn in the first place. Step 2 is about trying something different, and accountability can show you where you’re falling back into the same old patterns that have kept you trapped in porn for so long. Admitting your failures to someone is step 3, which is a critical part of accountability.
If you attempt steps 4 and 5 on your own (get rid of all porn and block new porn from coming in), it’s easy to leave yourself loopholes. When you ask someone to keep you accountable, you’re asking them to help you lock down the loopholes that have always allowed you to slip back into porn.
Since most people access porn on their computers and smartphones, it’s essential to have an accountability app. Covenant Eyes Screen Accountability monitors your devices for porn and sends your partner a report of what you’re looking at on your devices.
Find an ally to keep you accountable for quitting porn.
A trusted friend or mentor can make a great ally. The resources below share helpful info on finding the right ally for you:
- How to Find an Accountability Partner Who Can Really Help
- Samson Society (a great support group option for men who can’t find an ally in their immediate circle)
- STRIVE. This 21-day porn recovery program for men features an online community.
What does accountability look like in quitting porn?
Having Covenant Eyes removes a lot of the ambiguity in your accountability relationship. When you have it on your devices, it removes the secrecy and helps you live honestly and openly with the people you trust the most. This is vital because secrecy and shame are powerful forces that can drive you back to porn.
It’s not enough to download an app. You need to connect regularly with your ally. Accountability often fails when people only meet sporadically. Dr. Weiss and many others advise daily check-ins, and this is especially important in the early stages of quitting porn. (Covenant Eyes Screen Accountability reports go out daily by default). Connecting with your ally could be as simple as replying to a Covenant Eyes report or following up with a text message.
A porn-free life is a better life!
Dr. Weiss adds:
“You have to decide that you are worth living porn free. I decided that almost 25 years ago and just passed a polygraph verifying my freedom. I believe you’re worth it but your behavior will show you if you are. Don’t believe your words. Believe only your behaviors; otherwise, you can be in denial as to your commitment to being porn-free.
One of the most effective tools I’ve found to quit porn is Covenant Eyes Screen Accountability™. It helps with four of these six essential steps. Not only can it block porn before it gets to you, it also provides a report of your device use to a trusted friend–forcing you to be brutally honest and making it easier than ever for you to have the open and honest relationship needed to beat your porn addiction.
Remember, you are not the only one being affected if you are married or want to be married. Your spouse is affected by your porn usage. Your children are being affected as well. They deserve your best. You decide. Do they get the porn-drunk you or the porn-free you? I recommend the porn-free you. It’s the better you.”
Can I get rid from porn in gradually method ????? Not in one time at once but in step by step way……..
Can you? Perhaps. Should you? No. For one, this isn’t the most God-honoring way to get rid of it. Second, it is doubtful whether you’ll be able to just “cut back” without overindulging or cheating. Third, experience shows it doesn’t help in the rewiring of the brain to just wean yourself off.
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I’ve been an addict since the end of my last relationship 3 years ago, It was my solution for not just having sex with just any random person, I need to feel a connection with someone. So I figured porn would be my stand in and now I am hooked,(3-4 times a day for hours when I’m relapsing) I’ve tried to quit multiple times, never lasting more than 4 weeks.(I just failed on day 4 this time) I want to get better but my withdraw symptoms get real intense, I feel unbelievably horny and I can’t seem to think straight or catch my breath. I also get flue like symptoms for the first week or so. How long do I have to hold out for the withdraw symptoms to subside. I can’t connect with anyone, especially with girls now and I really like for that to change.
Withdrawal symptoms are due to the withdraw of hormones and neurotransmitters being activated in your system. The the worst of those symptoms will take at least two weeks to subside for many guys. For others it can last a month.
In the early weeks, take radical actions to get distance from porn. Get rid of computers, smartphones, tablets. Or get accountability software on your devices and have the Internet report sent to someone who can help you. When you are thinking clearest, that’s the time to shore up and protect yourself. Don’t wait until you are weak and hope you make the right decision.
I was SO obstinate and the urges were so strong that particular night I WANTED TO DO IT NO MATTER WHAT COST. I didn’t care about the consequences. It was deliberate sin against my better judgment. My addiction had spiraled out of control (which I am culpable for) and culminated in such INTENSE LUST that I HAD to have it. Satan found an opportune time to try to take my soul and I surrendered. At the height of my lust, I said I would give my soul for this. I have repented but there has been no restoration. God has left me because I left Him. I hope my downfall serves as a warning to those engaged in this sin. There are ETERNAL consequences. STOP. CONFESS IT. Become ACCOUNTABLE.
I agree there are eternal consequences. But I urge you not to stand in the place of God in this situation. The Bible does speak of people being brought to a place where it is impossible to restore them to repentance (Hebrews 6:4-6), but you should not stand in judgement over yourself as to whether you have truly “fallen away.” You say you have offered Satan your soul, but do not think this is an unbreakable pact. The Lord honors no such pacts between men and the devil, or otherwise men would never be delivered from demonic powers. Whole nations have committed themselves to false gods only to be later redeemed by the power of the Gospel.
If the enemy convinces you that all hope is lost, this will keep you enslaved all the more. What if God wants to make you a trophy of his grace? What if years from now you can stand before others and say, “God’s grace is so far-reaching, he can even save those who gave up all hope, those who committed their souls to Satan, those who were totally lost in sin”?
My advice to you is:
1. Remember, there would not be a spark of conviction and pain over what your sin has done between you and the Lord if God had truly abandoned you. People who are totally given over to their sin have no such convictions (Romans 1:24-32).
2. Find someone who can help you reason through passages of Scripture about this situation, someone who can help you understand the nature of sin and God’s redemptive promises.
3. Find the accountability you so desperately need for this sin.
4. Divorce yourself from all access to lustful images.
5. Read, read, read. Read as much as you can about porn addiction and recovery from it. Fill your mind with truth.
6. Pray, pray, pray. Ask God to show you the way out. Cry out to him. Believe me, I felt just like you at one point in my life, and I thought I had prayed a million times with no answer. But God is good and heard my cry, even when I was in my Egypt.
James, please reply/contact me if you see this…
God will never leave you nor forsake you! He hasn’t left. Seek him and put him first. Pray ceaselessly. Never give up. As long as you’re alive, do not give up! Seek help from Christian friends and family. True Christians who will remind you that GOD WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU, NOR FORSAKE YOU.
James, it’s clear you sinned with your words while intoxicated with lust. You weren’t of sober mind. Much like booze and drugs, the enemy can lead us from our God given nature through stumbling blocks.
It’s doesn’t sound to me like your heart backs up what your words said. God measures us by our heart. He knows you better than you know yourself. If you still desire to connect with him, he’ll still be there, but the enemy with not want you to see this. He’ll try and bog you down in guilt, shame and fear. This is not if God. I think the unpardonable sin is a heart that’s turned away from the Holy Spirit, with no desire to go back. This clearly isn’t you.
Please try again to connect with God and keep trying everyday. Faith isn’t a feeling, it’s a decision.
I will pray for you.
Hello James, really awakend me by your sentences….Even I have been struggling from Porn,…I do admit that I love God all by my heart but Satan always makes me stumble by the relapses….Ofcourse once I almost gave up and even struggling today too but I will not give up on God , please if you want to stand again be sure to email me….I will try my best by the grace of God to accompany you….
I committed spiritual suicide in 2011 due to my porn addiction. Do whatever it takes to STOP immediately lest you lose your soul like me. I was a porn addict for 8 years and one horrific night I willfully persisted in porn and became demon possessed and committed the unpardonable sin. God left me 2 years ago and now I live in constant fear, despair and regret. If only I would have told a friend about my addiction.
What unpardonable sin did you commit?
James, is there any way I can e-mail with you? I think I know what you’re talking about and have feared similarly…
Remember James that the only unforgivable sin is not accepting God into your life. I used to believe the same thing as you but as you read scriptures and look for God more you will come to realize His truth more. I don’t know if you actually are possessed by a demon or not but if so COMMAND IT OUT LOUD TO LEAVE YOU BY THE BLOOD OF THE LAMB, BY THE LORD JESUS CHRIST. I understand life is tough but remember that even if you have committed this “unforgivable sin” just accept Jesus into your heart, proclaim Him as Lord of your life, and tell Him that you need him and won’t make it without His help. Of course mean it with all your heart
james their is no such thing as losing the lord just ask for forgivness and he will grant it the bible says that Gods free gift of grace
My ex husband (now) left me and our children 5 yrs ago due to porn addiction. He has been addicted since age 12 and he is now 45. Is it wrong for me to have hope for us again? What are the chances he will or could be porn free? He does not seem happy. He did when he first left for a while, but now he seems very depressed and unhappy. Should I just move on to better or wait on him to possibly want to come back. Should I even take him back IF he wanted to come back? Please help. Confused…
Hi C,
That’s a hard one. I think I know what the “right” answer is, but its based on a lot of “what ifs.” I think it is always good to hope for your ex-husband: love always hopes (1 Corinthians 13:7). I cannot answer the question about you remarrying: that is something you need to come to your own convictions about. No doubt your husband is depressed. Since he’s been addicted to porn for over three decades and is now cut off from his family, I imagine he’s in a very low, self-absorbed place right now. There is still hope for him, but he needs to be broken over this thing. That is something you can pray for him.
Do you have support in all of this? I imagine this has taken quite a toll on you.
We have no support on this issue and don’t even understand how he could leave us over strangers. How could he do it and seem so happy about leaving? He isn’t happy now, but was SO happy when he came to visit with the kids for a few hours Monday to give them Christmas presents. The kids said they have never seen him that happy since he left. Strange… Why??? Why won’t he say he’s sorry? Why won’t he beg me to come back? Why do other men say their sorry and beg to come back? Why do some never leave? These are just some of the many questions the children and I have that have still not been answered. We have a great need to understand this, have these questions answered, etc. I don’t know if I should wait on him or try to move on. Most people just say “I can’t believe you would even want him back” or “You would never trust him again” or “You couldn’t trust him with your children or any children”… I will say that he was very inappropriate with my oldest daughter before he left us (not his daugher) My private investigator even found child porn on my hard drive of the computer he used. In court, my ex said it was an “accident” . I am so grateful for your response, as NO one has ever talked with me about these things and I just can’t get past it and need someone to explain things to me about porn addition. I honestly thought he was crazy about me and truly loved me. How could I have been so wrong and blind? Please don’t be “scared off” by my e-mail. I really need my questions answered and understand that yours may be your opinion and I’m ok with that. Please respond. Thank you so much. Gina
You haven’t scared me off, Gina. Thanks for replying.
I do think some understanding of the overall nature of porn addiction would be very helpful to you. It will at least help you to understand your husband. Here are some links that might be a help to you.
1. False Love: Overcoming Sexual Sin from Pornography to Adultery – This a free video series by Brad Hambrick, a Christian counselor, talks to those who are trapped in porn addiction. It will definitely help you get into the mind of an addict.
2. True Betrayal: Overcoming the Betrayal of Your Spouse’s Sexual Sin – This is the series Hambrick did for wives of sex addicts. It is excellent. I highly recommend you watch these.
3. 7 Questions Wives of Porn Addicts Often Ask – Great series of posts by Christian counselor Ella Hutchinson.
4. Straight Talk to Husbands Who Watch Porn – This is an article I wrote a couple years ago looking at how porn harms marriages from a scientific perspective.
You are asking a lot of very hard questions. There are many reasons for his state of mind right now: his pride, his hard-heartedness, etc. It is heart-breaking how this is impacting your children.
I highly recommend you find a counselor in your local area you can talk to. You can look for a local counselor here. Right now you need to get some timely wisdom for how to talk to your kids, how to help them have hope, and most of all, how to help your own heart to heal.
I know the felling… I love God and don’t want to be disowned… I still keep praying hoping it would leave … God have Mercy
Hey c I was addicted and my girlfriend left me but I got my act together and chaced her to the end of the earth and then married her I suggest you stay open but keep him in mind
This disease is killing youth today. Porn is a evil things. Best away to over come is to surrender almighty Allah. Believe me Islam is a solution for this. If you become addicted than you will start fasting from sunrise to sunset, all you feeling will be down.
Faithful & True Ministries, Mark Laaser.
Attend their 4 day workshop, get the tools you need, and don’t stop utilizing them. Work through a 12 step program = staying sober, stop making daily phone calls, going to SA meetings (Pure, or LIFE, meetings), stop counseling, start isolating, you’ll be acting out and looking at porn in no time. Put anything else before your recovery, and you will loose it.
As soon as I stopped utilizing what I learned at the Laaser group, I fell off the recovery wagon in no time flat. Back on it, hope to have my family back soon, daily calls and meetings for life!
Covenant Eyes is the best software out there. What it can’t do is stop me from acting out. I don’t need porn for that. It’s a great tool for blocking access, haven’t found another one out there as good.
If someone wants to access Porn, Having a block on their computer will be a good way to stop it at that access point. Having the same block on a smart phone or ipod touch will do the same. That solves two hot spots for porn access. Now, for the Porn addict, there are only a few thousand more even in a small town like mine. If the Porn addict wants to find it, they will, and the only thing that will stop them, is if they use a tool in their action plan, —->before<—— they get into the cycle of addiction. Once they are actively seeking out a Porn shop, or what ever, it's too late, barring an unexpected phone call, or boulder falling on their car. Look up the cycle of addiction.
I think that Dr. Weiss has 6 good steps, but the ilnformation/advise behind each step, is lacking, and needs elaboration. The titles themselves are Really good, take for instance Number two:
+++you have to be willing to do things you haven’t done before.+++ – – Very true
""""Seriously, if you keep quitting the same way, you’re likely to fail again. To quit, you have to give up what you’ve been doing and do what you have to do.""""
This is unhelpful, thought provoking at best. "Do what you have to do"? — An addict has at some point, if they do want to not be an active Porn addict, or Sex Addict, tried a lot of different things. They don't have any idea what they have to do, to become sober.
hi,
Im a girl and have been an addict as long as i can remember. God is my everything and many times i have turned to Him for help but i always seem to relapse. I have a boyfriend of 2 years with whom i am not sexually active which makes it harder. He’s struggling with masturbation and I with porn addiction. He talks to me about his problem but he doesn’t know about mine. He had a porn addiction too but has quit over 3 years ago and he said he finds people that watch it disgusting hence me keeping quiet. I feel like a hypocrite as i am viewed as a strong believer by my peers and friends and my family also frowns upon this(Christian home). I feel too ashamed to pray after as i feel i abuse of Gods grace and forgiveness which puts a huge blockage on my spiritual life. please help….. God bless!
Hi carly,
Do you have any women in your life you can speak with about this issue? I know this can be very difficult for a woman to talk about because of the stigma of porn being a “guy thing,” but there are many, many women out there in your shoes. I highly recommend you contact Jessica at Beggar’s Daughter about this. Her ministry is dedicated to women just like you.
Hi Carly I seem to be stuck in this same situation. I feel I have no one to turn to and I feel that I take God for granted a lot. I have gone in head first about curbing my addiction by doing things like if I feel like I’m about to watch it I go for a long run/jog. I hope we can communicate and morally support each other as this issue worries me also everyday.
God said you should be honest.
How did you stop? I am interested because your situation is exactly what I am going through.
I RELAPSE EVERY 5 TO 7 WEEKS. IT IS VERY GRAPHIC PORN. THE STRANGE THING IS I REALLY DON’T LIKE. I FIND IT STUPID. I AM VULNERABLE WHEN I AM DEPRESSED. WHEN I GET MY FINANCIAL HOUSE TOGETHER AND START TRAVELING AGAIN, I AM CERTAIN IT WILL GO AWAY. I LOVE ASTRONOMY, THAT HELPS A LITTLE. I WOULD LIKE SOME RESPONSES TO RELAPSE SOLUTIONS.
Thanks D. Reading your comment, I think this article could be a great help to you.
Hey.Am single guy,27yrs have been struggling with this kind of a thing for 4yrs now,stops & but then tempted back.Even am ashamed of myself.The lord have been good to me has saved me from (death)accidents more than three times.my workmates view me as a godly man but deep within me, am rotting.But from today henceforth I declare am not going back to porno again in Jesus Mighty Name.I believe the devil knows that I have a good destiny so he tries very hard to cut it short.Pls Holy spirit help me to overcome I don’t want to miss the rupture of the church
hello carly.I face that problem many times.every one knows I am perfect but I am not.but I came to realise that laziness and idleness has a lot to play.lack of the word and life without prayers has a lot to do.our spiritual life should not be defined by our church activities but by our times in the closet with God.if we spend more time with God then it Will go a long way to help.I am safe now because of that.
Hi carly,
When reading your comment I found myself relating completely to your situation as I too am a Christian with a Christian upbringing. I also find myself hypocrital of myself because my addiction to porn contradicts my beliefs and I know the guilt I feel when I know I should pray but am too ashamed because I took his grace for grantid after indulging just the night before.
My point is that although I don’t have a magic wand to get rid of the struggle, I do think it helps to know you are not alone. Don’t give up praying as God has not given up on you.
*THE SIN OF PONOGRAPH**
Porn was not made for entertainment or fun it
was made purposely to destroy both the actors
and their viewers. It feeds man with lust and
makes him hungry for more. That is what result
in masturbation and all abominable sexual act.
Ignorant men love to watch it for fun not
knowing that they are inviting demons of lust to
themselves. It is a great doorway for demonic
entrance. They don’t need to have spare keys to
be in your room. They only need you to watch
their product and they will come in through the
walls!. If you sit down alone to watch
something on the TV please have it in mind that
you are not alone.
There are evil beings looking out for your
weaknesses to attack you. When demons get to
know that you are weak in a particular area,
they will make it difficult for you to overcome
it. You will understand why people keep on
falling back into the same sin over and over
again!
The good news is, you can can still win and
overcome! in Jesus. Through discipline, prayer
and fasting. Otherwise, those demons will put
stumbling blocks in your paths to trap you so
we can’t afford to be careless friends. Too many
men are hooked to porn and are struggling to
overcome it after seeing the damaging side of it.
Even some pastors fall into it. We should know
that the actors are being used by demons to go
to that extreme to degrade their bodies. Married
men who get addicted to porn find it difficult to
sleep with their own wives, young men who are
not married will also masturbate.
Porn is very addictive, it is easy to watch but
hard to walk away from. They have labelled it
as “adult channel” it isn’t so it is abominable
channel!! A colleague of mine told me years
back that it is alright to watch porn with your
spouse if you are married, that was a lie! I disagreed with him. I wasn’t as ignorant as he was. If Jesus
wouldn’t watch why should we? knowing that
we are His bride and His temple.
People who watch porn end up having strong
irresistible sexual urges, because they have
invited the demon of lust to live in them. Once
the spirit brings up the desire you can’t stand the
pressure but do it with whoever you get,
whether your close relative, a child or even animal . This has
ended many into prison.
The rate at which sex offenders are increasing is
alarming in our society. Friends, close your eyes
from watching obscene pictures before it
destroys you. Some people have the nerves to
post porns on Christian sites on Facebook!!
Please delete or block such people straight
away! They are sending people to hell!. A man
who was addicted to porn confessed that his
whole life was destroyed by it. It distorted his
image on how he viewed women. He saw
women as nothing more than mere “sex
tools”
Romans 6:13
“Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead and your members of righteousness unto God”
What will help one to overcome this sin is the holy fear of God in a man, knowing that it will
be a shame to set your eyes on vulgar images
when the Lord is seated next to you. Porn is deadly, destroy it before it destroys you. Keep yourself pure!!!
PLS SHARE TO SAVE A SOUL??
Hi, I do not know you, and I can’t give advice because I am struggling with this right now, but your story really touched me and I will be praying for you. I hope you Succeeded in quitting after all these years, but Good luck to you if you haven’t yet. May God help you on your journey through this
I came to this site searching for a solution similar to what many are facing here.
And Carly, your situation literally brought tears in my eyes. I felt my porn related problem is nothing in front of yours.
By the way, I couldn’t get the girl whom I loved for years together :( (we can call it as an One Sided Love!).
So I have no one to confess or to get support :(. I am very very depressed.
I sometimes follow this addiction to forget HER memories…
I don’t even find any help from so called friends around me. I don’t even want to call them all my friends.
Yeah please if anyone wants to be friends with me, or can give me support in this moment, I will pray to God that you all live longer and happiest.
Please help…….
Hey I’m also a porn addict and I want to quit too all I can think about is sex what do I do?
Have you tried any of the “essential steps” in the article?
Yeah for all of those people who are out there who are desperately trying to purge away the great temptation and sin of porn the top three things I recommend is reading the Bible and Most of all the Book of Mormon they teach about the purity and love of Christ who can help you overcome any challange.
Second I would ask in faith with a sincere disire to be healed and don’t be afraid to lean on a friend for help
I wish you all the best Spencer
I want to scream, every Advisor is the same! What’s annoying about all these types of advice is that every adviser/ preacher is married!!
You’ve got a wife so it’s fine for u. I and many young single guys wanna hear from someone who’s not married and not planning to get married any time soon. Someone who has attractive girls approaching and flirting with him.
Better yet someone who has a gf but doesn’t have per-marital. To someone who’s married and has a sexual output..ie sex with his wife
Hi Newbie,
I hear you. When I was single, it was annoying to get advice from married men on this topic. I had to learn how to defeat pornography in my singleness, and it was a battle, to be sure.
Don’t despise the advice of married men, however. They were single once too, and they had to learn to fight temptation like any single man should. Instead, when talking to a married mentor about these thing, ask them to speak to you from their experience as a single man. Ask them to relay information that can help you, not just from their married vantage point.
We have a lot of good stuff on our blog for singles, so I hope you find something that can help you.
Hey Newbie, you want some advice?
You’re going to have to set some tough, clear boundaries. What’s more important, looking cool or your purity? I had a porn problem for 12 years. When I was coming out of it, my relationship with my girlfriend had to change. We shifted from a sexual relationship to practicing abstinence until we married over a year later. The only way that could work was if we set boundaries, boundaries such as avoiding being alone in a room with the door shut.
If you’re having difficulty with women, I will also advise you to shift towards focusing on your future wife. Instead of focusing on the girl that’s flirting with you, think if that’s the kind of person you’d want to spend the rest if your life with. Realistically, that’s how you need to view these girls that come up to you. Figure out what you want in your future spouse, if you’re a Christian then look for a Christ-centered woman, etc. Knowing what you’re looking for in a woman, and not settling for anything less, really helps you drown out the riffraff.
Hope this helps.
Hi Newbie,
I know this post is over a year ago, so hopefully you have grown greatly and porn does not have the choke on you as it did, but I wanted to say a couple of things that hopefully can help you. I am a mother, and a wife of a husband who has struggled with this subject. I wanted to add to Christian’s comments below about thinking about your future wife, and the relationship you desire to have with her for the rest of your life. Imagine your marriage as an empty house. You get married, and together decide to decorate it, put your touch, stamp, and style on it. You both together think of creative ideas on how to make the house fit each others needs, function, and be beautiful for yourselves. So together you guys pick the “right” furniture from the store, paint the walls, add the accessories, and so on. Now compare that to porn. By watching it as a single person, you’re filling your mind with how sex should be, you’re already decorating that house and putting items in it that only fit to your taste, your needs, your wants, your fantasies instead of going through the fun, beautiful, and creative process of creating a unique sexual intimacy with your wife…or decorating that house. You’re creating in your mind expectations that your future wife may not be able to or be comfortable with fulfilling, you’re robbing yourself of the pure and creative intimacy that only you two can create that is absolutely unique to you guys. I hope this makes sense and speaks to your heart. Just remember, regardless of what you’ve seen, God can wash away the filth of it, and make your intimacy with your wife unique to guys when porn is out of the picture. Porn is a poisonous thief that has no heart or care for whom it hurts.
Sure. I am married. And I have put my family through pains and trials of having been addicted to porn since the age of 4. 40 years later, I have ruined my marriage and family, having accidentally exposed my kids to porn a number of times and having lost my job a couple of years ago. Now I’m separated from my wife of 20 years and she told me that she is talking about divorce. It took this long for me to get serious about my addiction, and I hope and pray that the young gentlemen commenting on this page can look down the road and see the same things happening in their lives if they don’t find God’s true path for life NOW. Don’t ruin your life and others’ lives before you finally realize that it’s just not worth it.
I hear ya. How to be porn free sounds easier with a wife but really it’s no different. You think the same thing I thought if I ws married then I can have sex with my wife and this no poem problem.
Wrong.
100% wrong. It is worse.
Now I get mad at my wife or she is tired or she is busy etc but the ladies on the smartphone are always hit and horny. And free.
Now I see her as fat or not good on bed or undesirable because those porn girls are perfect. If I want one body type one day then some other fetish the next I just type it in and find scores of free videos at my fingertips.
So now it is just as hard to fight the xxx battle. But…
The stakes are higher. My wife wants to have sex with me and often I cannot perform. What?! You say that’s crazy. But it is because my mind sees those porn girls as being more attractive then my flesh and blood wife. My mind picks out every fault she has. Too this not enough that can’t do this and not good at that. Comparing her, a real human , to a trained actress on a xxx film getting paid to pretend and keep her body perfect, msybe even fake.
Porn causes me to lose track often at work and at home, go yo bed later than my wife and hate myself. I am a hypocrite. My litle girl scares me knowing she will grow up to be a woman that some one will look at and lust after the way I look at women, as objects of pleasure or fat ugly plain etc. ‘Shes got a nice’ this or that ‘she needs a little blah blah’ Men who have lust and xxx problems turn women into objects not people. Like looking at used cars or livestock for sale.
Plead don’t continue down thd porn rd. turn back now. Purify your heart and mind. Don’t think marriage will make it easier. Above all DONT MARRY IF YOU HAVE A XXX PROBLEM.
Hey there,am Joachim and am single.Guess you are satisfied now.Porn usage is evil and very demonic.Consuming porn is like exposing one’s body and soul to house demons.This has no good end as in the case of Sothom & Gomora.How to quit? First of all,the desire to want to quit porn usage should be instilled in you
You then need to pray fervently and ceaselessly for God’a divine intervention.
it’s okay email me… let’s talk about this.. let’s try to find a way. I’m not married, young 21 of age. my humble request.
Porn is everywere… You basically have to close your eyes to not be tempted
.. This is hard… I don’t want to go to hell for watching t.v. are trying to stand and constantly falling for porn… I love God and his word but it is very hard
Newbie;
I feel the same. I know and understand everything on what you’re going through, and I’m going through some similar stuff.
*THE SIN OF PONOGRAPH**
Porn was not made for entertainment or fun it
was made purposely to destroy both the actors
and their viewers. It feeds man with lust and
makes him hungry for more. That is what result
in masturbation and all abominable sexual act.
Ignorant men love to watch it for fun not
knowing that they are inviting demons of lust to
themselves. It is a great doorway for demonic
entrance. They don’t need to have spare keys to
be in your room. They only need you to watch
their product and they will come in through the
walls!. If you sit down alone to watch
something on the TV please have it in mind that
you are not alone.
There are evil beings looking out for your
weaknesses to attack you. When demons get to
know that you are weak in a particular area,
they will make it difficult for you to overcome
it. You will understand why people keep on
falling back into the same sin over and over
again!
The good news is, you can can still win and
overcome! in Jesus. Through discipline, prayer
and fasting. Otherwise, those demons will put
stumbling blocks in your paths to trap you so
we can’t afford to be careless friends. Too many
men are hooked to porn and are struggling to
overcome it after seeing the damaging side of it.
Even some pastors fall into it. We should know
that the actors are being used by demons to go
to that extreme to degrade their bodies. Married
men who get addicted to porn find it difficult to
sleep with their own wives, young men who are
not married will also masturbate.
Porn is very addictive, it is easy to watch but
hard to walk away from. They have labelled it
as “adult channel” it isn’t so it is abominable
channel!! A colleague of mine told me years
back that it is alright to watch porn with your
spouse if you are married, that was a lie! I disagreed with him. I wasn’t as ignorant as he was. If Jesus
wouldn’t watch why should we? knowing that
we are His bride and His temple.
People who watch porn end up having strong
irresistible sexual urges, because they have
invited the demon of lust to live in them. Once
the spirit brings up the desire you can’t stand the
pressure but do it with whoever you get,
whether your close relative, a child or even animal . This has
ended many into prison.
The rate at which sex offenders are increasing is
alarming in our society. Friends, close your eyes
from watching obscene pictures before it
destroys you. Some people have the nerves to
post porns on Christian sites on Facebook!!
Please delete or block such people straight
away! They are sending people to hell!. A man
who was addicted to porn confessed that his
whole life was destroyed by it. It distorted his
image on how he viewed women. He saw
women as nothing more than mere “sex
tools”
Romans 6:13
“Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead and your members of righteousness unto God”
What will help one to overcome this sin is the holy fear of God in a man, knowing that it will
be a shame to set your eyes on vulgar images
when the Lord is seated next to you. Porn is deadly, destroy it before it destroys you. Keep yourself pure!!!
I’m just 16 and i’m totally crippled with vulgar thoughts. I love a girl, but i don’t want lust to get into my love. I’ve been recently addicted to pornography. I have my dream to be fulfilled. But this addiction isn’t leaving me. Through this i may lose my family members, my love, my dream and even myself. So please i need your help to get my mind out of these things………
Hi, Franca, I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. If you’re a Christian, I’d encourage you to read where the Bible talks about pure and controlled thoughts. Philippians. 2 Corinthians. Taking them captive. Then, look back at the list of 6 things in the blog post and see where you need to close a door to porn or try something different. If you truly do the things the blog post suggests, then you can live porn-free.
Best, Chris
Hi. I am a girl and I’ve been watching porn since I was twelve. I don’t know how to stop and I’m too scared to get an accountability partner because I feel like I will be judged. How do I go about this?
For those who want to quit watching porn, it will not be easy to do so, but it can be done. No one can help you stop watching porn. Not the covenant eye, not your counselor, not even your loved ones.w Only you can stop yourself from watching porn. It will take some time. You will have your fails, but that should never stop yourself from continuing to move forward. When you fall down, pick yourself up and dust yourself off, your fine. Keep moving! To be honest, I just got done watching so pornography, and had a little fun. Am I going to hate myself for it, sure. There is nothing wrong with that, but the fact is I know that it isn’t over. I’m 21 years old and I know that I could break this. I refuse to give up. Now seeing so many people with this problem, I will quit watching porn and engaging in self pleasure. I promise or my life depends on it. To all of those who are willing to fight, your not alone.
Visit Pure Life Ministries’ website at purelifeministries.org.
guys i am also 15 and addicted to porn,the maxim i can stay without watching is 5 days,but on the weekends i dont know what happens,i get a headache than my brain starts craving for porn..actually i hate porn Cuz it is not even real and those r just actors perfoming in a dirty industry..lets form a society and commit ourselves to stop the addiction amd prevent others to become addicted”TOGETHER WE CAN OVERCOME PORN”
I am also want to stop from this way
Hey, I’m Sri , I am addicted to porn and i want to protect myself, i think i run after porn because of my loneliness, is there anyway you can help? and there is also this problem: a take a firm resolve to not to look at porn after looking at when i feel restless and i go in for help from God, but the very next day , i fall into the trap again, so please someone give me advice, i’m just 17 and this porn addiction affects my academics a lot.
Hello Sri, have you tried to apply any of the 6 steps that Dr. Weiss mentions in his blog post? Have you cleared house of the opportunities? It’s true that anything we try to fight ALWAYS fights us back, which is maybe why you struggle the very next day. Evil loves to make a fool of our promises to “never” do something again. But, God’s grace is fresh EVERY morning. If you truly want to quit, then it might involve some drastic measures, but it all depends on whether or not you really want to quit, which I hope you do. God is FOR you, and if that’s true, then who can be against you? (Romans 8:31).
-Chris
Covenant Eyes
I’m always praying but the temptation gets stronger the more I pray
Hi David, I have found it to be exceedingly true that whatever I fight tends to fight me back. Maybe you’re experiencing something similar. When I was experiencing this, having someone I could talk to when I was being “triggered” or tempted was hugely important. James 5:16, “Therefore confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. The prayer of the righteous is powerful and effective.” I’m not saying that temptation by itself is sinful, but the sheer act of speaking things into the light is powerful to diminish the power of darkness. Have you prayed out loud? There’s something about the spoken word. Yell it out! Cry out to your God. Find that trusted friend. God is for you!
-Peace, Chris
Covenant Eyes
Chris Mckenna;
Its Isaiah. I’ve tried the steps in videos and stuff like that, but the thing is, I’m dealing with a historical problem. If anyone’s wants to contact me and help me out, email me at isaiahserna407@yahoo.com, and I promise I’ll answer back. I hope I hear from people…..
Hi.
I’m Gaynor and I am 18 and female, I don’t know how it played out but I became addicted to porn/ masturbation. I started with just the normal lust at a young age 6 or 7 and it just became worse, I don’t know who to blame because my family is very spiritual and strong Christians, but when I told them once they thought I was possesed and that I needed cleansing.
They however did not solve the problem .
Till this day I have not told them because they would judge me and make me feel really bad and since I live with them every day I don’t think it will be easy to just say it again.
I grew up in a God fearing family but yet I have not felt the amazing power that everyone boasts about although I have seen work done from him.
I really want to stop because I feel like I live two separate lives.
There are not a lot of people who help females get over porn addictions and it’s sad because I don’t know any women who have come out, or they are afraid to come out.
I just need help!!! I want that deliverance but how am I going to get it if my own family cannot help me???
Hi there! Well, being possessed is probably not the issue here at all! I think you’re being wise to keep your information private from people who would misunderstand the issue and put into “treatment” that would not be helpful and in fact could be harmful. When you talk about “normal lust at age 6 or 7” I’m not really sure what you mean. I think it’s normal for us to explore our bodies for sure, but being overly sexualized at an early age is sometimes a sign of abuse. I can’t judge at all by what you’ve said here, but I’d really like to see you find a counselor who can help you process through your childhood experiences and help you understand your sexuality in a healthy way. You’re 18, so you’re fully able to find a counselor on your own. You don’t need anybody’s permission!
Counseling can be expensive, so here are some tips. If you are a student, many colleges/universities have free counseling services. If you live near a university that trains counselors, you may be able access affordable services even if you are not a student there. You can always, always ask a counselor if they work on a “sliding scale” which means an income-based fee system. Also, many communities have Family Resource Centers where affordable counseling services are available. Also, most insurance plans do include a certain number of counseling sessions per year.
The truth is that most of us as adults have to look outside our families for help like this. The good news is, though, that help is available!
Peace to you, Kay
Am having the same problem????
Im tired of this life.I want to quit it at all cost.
Hello, Chris – I’m deeply concerned about your comments about suicide – here’s the truth…you have unmeasurable value! Your life is a precious gift and a blessing to this planet. Please find someone you can talk to about your struggles. If you don’t have anyone you can talk to, and you start to have suicidal feelings again, promise me you’ll call this number: 1-800-273-8255.
God is for you! Chris, you can get through this, and it will be hard work, but it’s worth it. Remember the strength you have in Christ – Romans 8 can remind you. The cross of Jesus Christ IS strong enough to overcome everything. Even this.
Peace, Chris
porn has ruined my creativity and my personal relationship with Jesus but thanks be to God because He has used Jesus to set me free from porn. I wish success to everyone struggling to stop it,With God Everything is possible
.
Wow!!Im 14 and i also struggle with this…It’s affecting my life and i want to stop!…Thank you for this Great tips it helps seriously!…God can only help you if your willing to stop…Porn is starting to affect younger generations and children…We must pray so this will get an end…Thank you so much
There’s a couple of things I do to keep my mind off of pornography. 1 I have supper and game night on Wednesday night with a couple of friends and 2 I’ll have bible study once in a while at my place
Hi, guys, my name is Silvester and I have an addiction to porn and masturbation. I just finished highschool and I’ve got all this dreams that I have and I don’t see a future where I’ll be forced to look for porn just to live a happy satisfied life. The truth is I’m 17,living with my mum, who I even don’t want her to know that I have been watching porn and masturbation for close to five years now. She has caught me one time and she almost lost it. It would break my heart if it was to go back there again. Please,HELP ME BEFORE ITS TOO LATE.
Hello, Silvester – I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. There might not be a stronger addictive force than sexual addiction. Which means, your own power might not be enough! You might need some kind of community to help you. Is there any other person you can talk to about this struggle? It’s so much easier, like the blog post says, to get honest with another person. What about a forum full of people who understand? Maybe nofap.com with Alexander Rhodes? There are 1,000s of men who will truly understand your struggle. Also, what about your device? What changes are you willing to make in order to close the porn doorways? You DO have some control here, but it will take a collection of specific actions.
Friend, I hope the very best for you. If you believe in the power of God, then keep turning to Him, cry out to Him. He never tires of hearing from his precious sons and daughters. No amount of struggle will ever surprise Him or make Him turn away from you. NOTHING. There’s always hope, Silvester. And, if I can help you in any other way, please let me know.
Warmly,
Chris
Covenant Eyes
Hey jus wanting to quit watching porn is a great step and also working on the contigences tht can bring a relapse…..
If any need a friend to help i am here.
Hi, am 20 years and I have been caught captive by porn and masturbation. The harder I try to quit the more obsessed I become in it. If I could just get someone to share with in Twitter. I just need to to quit it at all costs and life normally just like others. Please DM @MartowhTuggieh
Hi, Martin – it’s well-known in therapy circles that whatever you obsessively try to quit actually becomes the very thing your mind fixates on all the more. You might require therapy to learn how to process your compulsions when they arrive.
I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. Also, the blog post here provides some clear steps you can take, and too often, people overlook the first one which is to actually make a clear and effective decision to stop. If you don’t do that, then you won’t get rid of the smartphone or device that you’re using. What are you willing to do? You won’t be able to quit unless you’re willing to “gouge out the eye” or “remove the arm” if that’s the problem. God is for you and so am I!
Regards, Chris
Please someone help me.. it’s been more than 10 years I’m watching porn.. i really do wanna quit watching porn.. and about the masturbation it’s became like always no gap.. please someone help me
Hello, I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. What have you tried? The blog post lays out 6 essentials that usually lead to a more pure life. It won’t happen until you really, really, really want to quit. The first step is yours.
Chris
I’ve been into pornography and masturbation for 10yrs now. Honestly I wnt to quit it but I always find myself going back to it. Whenever I have access to d internet and I’m alone I must visit and download so many porn videos. It’s affecting my academics and spiritual life. What do I do pls?
Hi Ekelwe. There are many steps to take to overcome this habit, but it is possible by the power of God. I recommend you read through our free e-book Your Brain on Porn and then ask me if you have any questions about what to do next.
think of your future with porn and without it. you will find its not even .01 % worth of future. find your dream set traget and then shoot with full efficiency.
I am also a person who likes pornography… i also do it when i get frustrated of many bad events that happen in my life.. i am just 15 now and i think that you and i both should make a good friend who understands us a lot and help us to get out of it..
Hi Ekekwe , I have the same problem as you. Let’s be friends and help each other . Do you use Twitter ?
I am 15 years old I started this habit of porn and masturbation. I have also lost faith on me so we both can come out of this together if we become friends.
Ekekwe, U said it yourself -alone-, U need to find someone u can trust to help U whenever U’re alone and gonna watch it they come and lift U off Whatever u’re using to watch these things on
quitting porn is not easy but i can help .e mail me on tonitobato@ gmail.com
once i stop in 2 week again i getnet
Hey, this happens a lot. Up and down, sometimes you are doing great but other times, its not that great. I’m not the best person to say this but, the only way that you will efficiently quit pornography is by having a relationship with Jesus. We can’t do this stuff on our own. When we have a true relationship with Jesus these desires will come but with Jesus we can fight temptation. Remember Josheph (Genesis), the wife of a ruler wanted to sleep with Joseph. What did Joseph do? He RAN AWAY. Sometimes we just can’t fight temptation with verses, we need to escape these sinful pleasures.
I know its hard, i still struggle.
Please get rid of your internet connection at home. Use the internet at a public library. It’s the only way to stop porn from destroying your life. I know, I am speaking from experience. God bless you. Ian.
That’s exactly what is happening to me. Wish I have never started this. :-(
You need to have the desire to want to quit and pray always for God’s divine intervention.God is able!
Hey, I’m Sri , I am addicted to porn and i want to protect myself, i think i run after porn because of my loneliness, is there anyway you can help? and there is also this problem: a take a firm resolve to not to look at porn after looking at when i feel restless and i go in for help from God, but the very next day , i fall into the trap again, so please someone give me advice, i’m just 17 and this porn addiction affects my academics a lot.
Hello Sri, have you tried to apply any of the 6 steps that Dr. Weiss mentions in his blog post? Have you cleared house of the opportunities? It’s true that anything we try to fight ALWAYS fights us back, which is maybe why you struggle the very next day. Evil loves to make a fool of our promises to “never” do something again. But, God’s grace is fresh EVERY morning. If you truly want to quit, then it might involve some drastic measures, but it all depends on whether or not you really want to quit, which I hope you do. God is FOR you, and if that’s true, then who can be against you? (Romans 8:31).
-Chris
Covenant Eyes
I am 17. Live in Nigeria. And I have a big porn/masturbation problem. When I’m at school, I try to be close to God. But when I visit my parents, it seems like something comes over me. All I can think of is porn. Finally, I succumb get some porn and then masturbate. When I go back to school, I repent and clean up my act only for the cycle to repeat itself whenever I visit my parents again. Right now, I’m feeling very guilty and depressed. I just finished masturbating. Sometimes I wonder if I can ever break free of this 3 year old addiction
Hello Eyes only – have you tried any of the 6 Essential Steps listed in the blog post? What is it about visiting your parents that acts as a trigger? Yes, you can break free. Through the power of Christ, ALL things are possible and He breaks every chain. But, we must surrender constantly to His authority. Here’s good news – God’s grace is fresh EVERY morning. God is FOR you. Which of the 6 steps will you take right now?
-Chris
Covenant Eyes
I would say looking at the current patterns of thinking and habits. Looking at these can help you see where sin has blinded you and kept you going deeper into destructive situations and habits.
Ekekwe……… to get something u want you must sacrifice something to get what you really want ………. all you have to do is sacrifice and get rid of your internet for like 1 or 2 months trust me u will never watch porn ………thats the only way out …….during those times that you do not have internet try to feed your brain with another healthy habit and finally pray and your bible always….cry to lord jesus to come to your aid. peace be with you
If you really want to stop it Islam has given solution ,if you cant controll . marry as early as possible ,if it is not possible then fast , today world need teaching of Islam ,plz read more about Islam don’t trust media which shows wrong about Islam may Allah protect us from this evil act ,and respect women they are not made for sexual purpose
Hi Ekekwe, I know this is quite a bit after you posted this, and I hope you have been able to quit porn for good.
I just wanted to chime in and say that even if you haven’t keep trying. The only way you can succeed is to keep trying. You have to want to quit, really want to quit.
It’s not easy, and it will suck for months, but then life will be so much better. Good luck.
Ben
To all who hopefully still do this…
I need SERIOUS help!!! I’ve dug a HUGE hole for myself with this masturbation problems and pornography addictions. It’s affecting my concentration and, most importantly, my spiritual life. I’d Is anyone there, for the love of God?
Hello Isaiah – I’m sorry you’re struggling so much. You have to really want to quit – this is not an easy battle. Have you tried the steps in the post? God is for you, and is with you, but I find that He works powerfully through our steps – our “grace-driven” efforts to seek Him fully. Peace, Chris
Good luck to everyone. I certanly need some myself. Even though I have watched porn for only half a year its still dang hard to quit. Any suddgetions?
Hello DL – yes, very hard to quit, and it gets more difficult to quit the longer you stick with it. Did you read the blog post? What did you think of what it said?
playing a lot of videogames helped me and got me yo quit u need yo find a hoby that u really like ti distract your mind
Put it in a list of good habits it leave it by itself
I’m 15 years old! And since two years I’ve been watching porn and masturbating! I really wanna leave it! But I couldn’t! I dont know how to leave that habit! Because of this my studies , my relationship with Jesus , my singing skills are getting affected! ???
Hello, Eunice – on one hand, my heart breaks for your situation. Addiction just takes the life and motivation right out of us. Did you know there’s a term for it? It’s called “brain fog,” and I also remember it during times of struggle (which is probably why your singing skills are being impacted). But, on the other hand, you’ve admitted the issue, and that’s a great step! Now, comes the hard work – are you ready? When you look at the blog post you commented on, pay close attention to each item Dr. Weis mentions, especially #2 – “get brutally honest with someone.” Can you do that? He also lays out other steps you can take, which when they work together, they form a powerful front against addiction. But, you have to get #2 right. Can you do that? I truly hope you can.
Eunice, God is for you! Anything is possible at the cross of Jesus Christ. Read Romans 8 to be reminded of who you are in Christ :)
Peace, Chris
The best thing to quit your self on that is to read your bible, go to church who teach about Christ, Gospel and salvation and do good. Satan can do everything he wants just to ruin your lives by watching those bad stuffs but if you have relationship with Jesus Christ you will think 100x before you do that. God can change lives if you are willing to submit your self to Him. God can change you permanently.
Even if I tried many times to remove my self from pornography but I could not overcome porn ,I started watching porn vedio five years ago then I become most visitor of pornography sites then every day I do sex with my hand and then masturbat now I am addicted on porn .please show me some way to remove my self from that world
Hello, I’m so sorry that you’re struggling in this way. It is not easy to break free but it is possible. Here is a blog post that explains 3 strategies for breaking free: https://www.covenanteyes.com/2010/05/13/3-biblical-strategies-for-fighting-lust/
Peace, Chris
Hi, my case is really terrible… I’m a girl, I’m not supposed to be into all this… I try reading books online, and the next thing is that I see myself opening a porn wedsite. I don’t understand why it’s always like that, I’m spending a lot on it and it’s getting really annoying please pray for me.
Hi, Florence, I’m proud of you for having the guts to admit that you’re struggling. Now, the next step is to close the doors to the porn. In the blog here, there are steps to take, but you have to take them! It’s not some magic spell. You have to actually take the steps. And, if you do, they often work. Can you do that? Get rid of the phone? Get a sponsor or friend to talk to? Prayer alone will not be enough. It’s necessary, but not enough.
Peace, Chris
I’m 31 yrs old and struggling with porn, I need help, I’ve been doing so great without porn for months now, but I was talking to someone I like yesterday and I guess that triggered these feelings, what can I do, how many times can I repent before God leaves my side.. I’m so scared I will ruin my salvation.. I need someone to talk to that won’t judge me..I feel so disgusting of myself..😰
Hello, Dee – I’m sorry that you’re still struggling. What have you tried? Do you believe you can quit? If you don’t believe it’s possible, then it won’t happen. Do you believe that the Cross of Christ that you gave you life to can break even your sin? Or, do you believe that it only works for everyone else’s sin? These are the big questions that you need to ask while getting alone so God can look you in the eye and lovingly answer. No judgment. He’s not mad at you. I think God is mad at porn and what it’s doing to His precious child. That’s you. Would you read one more thing? Here: https://www.covenanteyes.com/2012/04/23/how-to-quit-porn-6-essential-steps/
Peace, Chris
I’m 31 yrs old and struggling with porn, I need help, I’ve been doing so great without porn for months now, but I was talking to someone I like yesterday and I guess that triggered these feelings, what can I do, how many times can I repent before God leaves my side.. I’m so scared I will ruin my salvation.. I need someone to talk to that won’t judge me..I feel so disgusting of myself..😰
Hello, Diana – what have you tried? When you read the 6 essential steps, which part are you struggling with? We believe that these steps if carried out consistently can bring redemption. Alone, you will continue to struggle, mightily. Find a team of help.
Peace, Chris
Go to God in prayers..
Hi this is Daniel I have been watching porn since I was 13 and now I am 19. I realize that it has affected me in so many ways, pls I need help and support cos I feel embarrassed to say it to anyone else that I do watch porn and masturbate at such an age. Please Help me overcome this
Hi, Daniel – being open is good. Nice job. Now, I’m going to ask your permission to be direct. It sounds like you can handle it.
You CAN’T beat this. Not in the way you’re currently trying. Not alone. Not keeping it to yourself. The enemy is stronger than your individual efforts.
It sounds like you want to do the right thing. So, here’s the issue – the choice is yours. No one can stop you from looking at porn. NO ONE! If you’re a Christian teenager, then it’s time to start believing that you’re a child of God and start acting like it. I’m being very direct – I think we tend to take a too gentle approach with guys and watching porn. NO! We were made for more. It’s time to be men. It’s time to love and respect the women around us AND on our screens. Even if they don’t respect themselves, WE have to decide to choose respect for them. This is on us. No more excuses. More than conquerors! Read Romans 8, all of it, to see what you were created to be. A warrior. Fearless. Of God. Untouchable. Unshakable. Settle for nothing less! Is your phone the issue? Then get rid of it. Do you struggle at night? Then no internet after 9pm. Do you masturbate? Then go (with parent permission!!!) get a tattoo of scripture put on your wrist. I guarantee you’ll quit :) How badly do you want this? You have to want it. You have to want freedom INSIDE and do things that prove you want it on the OUTSIDE.
I have faith in you. God is rooting for you! And, I am, too.
Peace, Chris
Here is the approach that I adopted.
1. I remove all porn on my PC using a software called Content Cleaner from:
http://www.contentpurity.com/
2. I installed CovenantEyes to block access to porn.
This is a good start.
I am only thirteen years of age. I remember being on the computer and a screen just popped up in my face. I was fascinated and lost in this world where no one cared about hiding their private parts. For so long I have tried, tried and tried, however, this urge comes and overcomes me. I hope I can stop this as it leaves me depressed and makes me feel worthless. When ever I wake up I feel like a pile of bricks and I can’t get up because of how I feel. It destroys me emotionally every time I watch this sinful thing. I pray and hope to God that I can overcome this urge. I am inspired by your comments and I hope I can and will stop watching porn.
Thank you,
Thank you so very much for your essential help. What I found most important was being brutally honest to the other. I am sure I have the right zeals to get me going more firmly, and besides I must stop the negative vibes from entering into my brain as I have responsibilities to the others around me.
Hello im 30 years old and I’m in a committed relationship with the love of my life, I have had a porn, lust, and sex addiction since I was around 13 years old. I struggle on a daily basis with looking up porn on my phone or looking for other women just to talk sexual with. It is ruining my relationship and I see my girlfriend hurt daily from my addiction. I want this all to just go away! I don’t want the feeling that I need or want to do these things ever again in my life. I’ve tried to just stop cold turkey but it never works I go right back to it the next day, she doesn’t understand how it’s an addiction and how I can’t just stop doing it thats why I’m reaching out for help. What can I do? It’s ruining my whole life
Christopher, I’m sorry that you’re struggling. The blog post gives some very practical steps – actions you need to take in order to achieve the outcome that you desire. You can’t pray it away. Pray can fuel your actions, but grace-driven effort is needed. If you struggle daily, then get a dumbphone. If you struggle daily, then have a daily morning phone call with a trusted mentor or friend to start the day with prayer and God’s mercy. It’s a question of what you’re willing to do! Cold turkey doesn’t work. Replacement does. The reward system you’ve created in your brain needs to be fed with other activities. From talking to counselors, those who are successful in breaking free from addiction have a few things in common: 1. Social Support (group of men) 2. Finding Spirituality 3. Find Meaning/Purpose 4. 12-Step Affiliation (mentoring/accountability/CE) 5. Improve Quality of Life (exercise, sleep, eating). It’s up to you!
Chris
You’ve got to pray earnestly for God to help you and try telling a spiritual head for counselling. Always have it at the back of your mind that watching it affects will affect your destiny. Most importantly, pray and fast.
Hi what I did was get rid of my internet on phone bought a really old Nokia and had no access if you have it you use it
well i am facing it as well but to really quit it you have to be fed up and tired of seeing it. Then you should get rud of all the porn things and speak to someone who you trust and who is willing to help you.
Engage yourself into other activities like playing games . Or addict your self to other things like technology sport etc
Hi,
I’m Julia, and I’ve struggled with a porn addiction since I was 12 (I know, 12 years old!) And after doing horrible things to my body, I find I cannot quit this pattern. I always can stop for months on end, but then I just start again. I’m afraid for my family and who I’ll be in my future. I’m afraid for my relationship with God and my future friends. Now I am beginning to see and imagine people as if they were in a porn video. I see porn everywhere, and I’m terrified. I will try to follow these steps as best as I can, but I’m afraid that if I tell anyone, no matter how much I trust them, I’m scared they won’t want to be friends with me, or my parents might disown me. The rest of these rules I will follow to the best of my abilities. Is there anything else I could possibly do to stop?
Hi Julia,
I suspect that at this point, the fear and shame that you feel are a huge factor in activating the cycle. The more fear and shame that you feel, the more you need something to distract you and make you feel better for a while, and porn works perfectly in that moment. Here are some things I think you could do.
1. Work on accepting that God loves you perfectly and completely in every moment, because God does. This is the greatest truth of our lives, and if we can connect to this reality and live into it, our need for dysfunctional behaviors will fall away.
2. Find people who will love you like God does, who will accept you completely without shaming or harming you, no matter what. This means being vulnerable with others, which is hard! But when we find those safe people, it’s increadibly rewarding.
3. Here’s a short animation on the shame-addiction cycle, and some ideas for interrupting it.
4. Your sexuality is normal and healthy. It’s normal to feel sexual arousal. It’s normal to masturbate. You are not broken, you have not harmed yourself irreparably. Trust in love, and interrupt the shame cycle, and see where you grow.
I hope these things help. Let us know how you’re doing,
Kay
Jess makes sure u pray regular and also have it in mind whenever u feel like watching porn switched off your internet connections becus its not easy stoping but when u started having it in mind dat u wont comes to that again makes sure u stands on it watching porns affected many its not a good behaviour pray everyday and believe it wont happen again
Hi my name is Von,I’m 12’years old.I startedwatching porn a few months ago,and I’m not betting better.I don’t have a religion so I don’t know what to do.I tried to delete all of my resources but it’s not helping.If I tell anyone about this I’m sure I will get shunned by my family and friends.At this point I have no other ideas.I will try to stop this addiction by following these steps.Lord knows why I started this world of hell
Hey there.
I’m so sorry this has happened to you.
I know you said you don’t have a religion, but it sure sounds like you’ve got the kind of shame around sexuality that we often see from religious traditions. I’m sorry about that. I think it’s really important to understand that your sexuality is a normal part of yourself. Of course you will feel arousal, of course you will explore that. However, with anything that’s normal and healthy–food, sex, exercise–we can over-use those things that feel good, right? So we simply want to be healthy in the way that we enjoy the good gifts of life.
I think shame very quickly becomes a huge driver of over-using behaviors. Here’s a short animation on interrupting shame cycles which you might find helpful.
I hope that you do have safe people in your life that you might be able to talk with? Perhaps a school counselor?
Peace to you,
Kay
I started watching pornography videos when my mom went into a nursing home because she was so sick that the doctors couldn’t take care of her. So finally I talked to my pastor from my church and told me that it’s hard on the budget to buy and then throw so I threw them out for good. Then all of the sudden I started watching it on my phone so I talked to my female friend about it and I asked her if she could keep it between me and her. But as far as I go now,it’s gonna be a brand new day for me starting in the morning.
Exactly! I am 29 years old and find myself watching porn. I know it’s wrong but i cant stop. Should I get help?
If you want help, get it!
Thank you sir, hope it’ll work.
I am sick of it. Im trying to stop watching all adults scenes but unfortunately i do it repeatedly .
This is all lies. There is no such thing as porn or masturbatory addiction. Get okAY with touching yourself, and you will calm down. Don’t listen to organized religion’s take on masturbation. THESE PEOPLE ARE NOT DOCTORS.
Good afternoon Sir, just saw this article on how to quit porn. I somehow got addicted to porn in 2011. Its been a besetting sin in my life. In my own case, I may have an immoral dream and wake up with the urge to masturbate and I find myself unable to resist the urge and then I bam! I’m viewing porn.
I was a little girl when I got introduced to lesbianism by a neighbour’s daughter and our house help and I’ve been struggling with this ever since. Whenever I view porn, it’s only lesbian porn. I am tired of riding and falling in my spiritual life. I’ve rededicated my life back to CHRIST. I’m currently fasting and in three nights in a row I’ve had immoral dreams. I woke up not having the urge to masturbate but I want to live completely free of this chain of addiction.
I checked out the porn blocker site but realized that I need to pay to subscribe. In the part of the world where I live in, I don’t have access to credit cards and stuff like that. I’m trusting God to break those chains off me before this month is over so I can live a victorious Christian life. I’ll appreciate any suggestions. Many thanks, God bless you.
Hi, Kate – you’re courageous for posting. That’s a great step. I think there are plenty of things you can do without paying for a service. Make a clear plan for “what do I do when I wake up from an immoral dream” and stick to it. Do you have accountability in your life? Someone you can text that moment you wake up after an immoral dream, and say, “I just had a dream! I need to tell someone!” Have you ever read anything by Neil Anderson about breaking soul chains? He speaks specifically about some of the spiritual bondage that you might be experiencing in these dreams. I hope something there might help! Blessings, hope, and peace to you.
Chris
I realised a long time ago that pire will and brain power isn’t gonna get me anywhere! I accepted Jesus Christ into my life 10 years ago, asking for his guidance and forgivness. Over time I had strayed from God and thats how I found myself with a porn addiction. I tried to get rid alone over a 2 years and completely failed! This is until I realised I was being controlled by a demon, that could only be casted off in the name of Jesus. That night, I said: “Lord, when I accepted you into my life, you gave me the power to use Jesus’ name, so I command that spirits of sexual immorality to cease there grip from me, and to crawl back to the pits of hell in the name of Jesus Christ, my Lord and saviour!!!”. Since then, I have not watched a single porn video, I have not wanted to masturbate, and my mind has been cleared of all of these sinful desires. So trust me when I say, even if you do quit porn usage, without Jesus, that spirit will still be inside you!
I have a problem with the devil feeding me images. I don’t look at porn . help! God says its an open door . I prayed in tongues but the door remains open. Help
Honestly, there is nothing you can do. You have to find it in yourself to stop watching adult films. Covenant eyes will only be there as long as you pay for it. What if you get the itch to watch porn again, what do you do then? Stop paying for it and boom, you have to start all over again. You don’t need some fancy internet filtering to quit watching porn. All you need is the will to quit. I know that sounds corny, but it’s the truth.
I need to get out of this pit of porn and the latter just isn’t long enough. I can’t get out. I have the same feelings. This is horrible.
indulge in other works like do some exercise to deviate your mind
Hi I have the same problem, I am only 16 and I have been looking at porn since I was 13, take one good look at porn and think about how disgusting it is, think about how uncomfortable the video is, imagine you being the guy/girl and that video being sent to everyone you know, that is all I have to say.
Hi I have the same problem but I quitted it for some months maybe 6 then again got back to the addiction I want to be free of pornography addiction as I cannot dehumanize women and be a crock I want to quit and I’ll quit from now onwards I promise my life and I’ll help the similar addicts tooo
Hey! your brain has been enslaved by pron. You should try to hangout with friends enjoy nature and whenever sexual thoughts arrives in your brain do some physical activities maybe like playing football ,jumpropes , pushups or go for a walk . I highly recommend you to change your dns which is free from porn websites. Try to be more socialize learn new skills and do not remain free. It’s you who can control the addiction so , implement these ideas and move forward life is awesome rule your brain otherwise, it will rule on you
I got it, now tell me how to deal with my “needs” when my wife hits menopause and says ” I’ve talked to some friends and I might get my sex drive back in a few years” Tell me how to deal with that.
I am 17 and whenever I find myself alone at home I start watching pron I really want to quit but I am just unable to coz the more far I am willing to go from it the more closer it pulls me back and I don’t even realize that am watching pron I just keep enjoying one by one one by one and at the end I feel ashamed of my self and feel like killing myself it’s really affecting my academics as well as spritual to be e life I want to be closer to God but I can’t go in front of him with this dirty here I and for forgiveness every time but how log can he really forgive me I really need to get this pron this hell out of my life
Hi, you are never outside of God’s grace. It never ends. Runs out. Your individual sin is not greater than the cross. I start with these things because the enemy is a master of lies and he’s using them against you. That’s the Truth/Spirit side of things. On the flesh/world side of things, whatever you’re watching porn on when you’re alone has got to go. You can’t handle it – especially not alone. Don’t believe the lie that you can (trust me, I’ve believed that lie too many times). I don’t think there’s any more than just a very, very small group of men who can break free without deeply honest conversation and drastic actions (like removing devices and access). So, the choice is yours! I can’t force you to quit. It’s up to you.
May God give you grace. May grace fuel your efforts. And, may your efforts succeed.
Chris
I want to quit watching porn please help.
i think both of us are facing the same problem because i tried to quit but it seems impossible
You neet take suggestions from your good friends and concentrate on different things when rise bad think in your mind .Dont think, dont alone when you feel guilty, try it may help you.
I really need a friend to where I come from I’ll just get shunned behind doors if I ask someone to help me. I’m on twitter. Send me a dm I jueed help for the first month
Don’t be afraid be quite and Do other things through whatever you can stay away from porn block all the sites too
Regards = Unknown ****
Highly Recommend a Christian Book “Theology of the Body”.
Describes God’s Gift of Sexuality and the Purposeful Design of the Body For Pleasure in a Marital Bond.
It reveals how Porn Perverts the Gift of Sexuality and the Pleasures God Intended Using our Sexual Nature as a Renewal of Marriage Vows.
Hi i have been watching pornography since 6 years i cant stop watch, i want to stop though but everyday i watch porn and i mean everyday never had one without watching porn. i really want to stop but how its repeating like this up till now i need help
Kyle,
Thank you for reaching out on this platform and asking for help! That is no easy thing to do, so I commend you in taking the first step towards recovery!
First, pray! Ask God to give you the strength to keep fighting against porn. Do you have a close friend or mentor whom you can reach out to for help? I have found that when I am struggling with sin (or anything in life!), having an ally to walk alongside me and pray for me makes a huge difference. They can also be a great part of using Covenant Eyes! You will be less tempted to watch porn, if you know that your friend will be notified when you do.
I am praying for you! Do not give up. We serve a mighty God!
Moriah
relieve your mind of that stress of porn related stuff and tell yourself it is not worth it.