Addressing pornography in your parish can be a full-time job, and maybe you have a coordinator who does in fact have it as his or her job description. Whether or not that role exists in your parish, faith communities that are succeeding with evangelizing hearts and minds on this very…
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How Building “Negative Emotion Tolerance” Helps Us Pursue Sexual Purity
Admittedly, the title of this post is a mouthful, but if you’ll stick with me it won’t be as complicated as it sounds, and it will be worth your time. What Is “Negative Emotion Tolerance”? What is negative emotion tolerance? It is our ability to endure unpleasant emotions. Many of…
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5 Quick Tips for Staying Sexually Sober During the Holidays
This post has been updated as of November 2020. As a Sexual Integrity Mentor™, I see it happen every holiday season to many of the men I mentor. Slips. Relapses. People essentially take a holiday from their recovery, and as a result, fall back into many of their old sexual…
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My Story of Freedom from Pornography
As I’ve slowly and methodically unpacked my addiction over the past 15 months I’ve truly come to learn a lot about myself, much more than I ever really cared about in the past. I’m sure that stems from the fact I really didn’t care so long as I got my…
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Why I’ve Never Placed My Wife as Number One
I’ve never placed my wife as number one in our relationship. For the first 20 years of our marriage I had completely selfish reasons for not putting her first. For the last 13 years of our marriage she’s still not number one, but now for the right reason. Before you think I’ve lost…
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No Condemnation For Porn
Many Christians believe two powerful and contradictory lies. On one hand, they tell themselves that watching porn isn’t that bad—it’s a personal decision that doesn’t affect anyone else. On the other hand, they’re terrified of anyone finding out about their porn use, as though it were the most shameful and…
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Porn and the Problem of Impatience
Fast food. High-speed internet. Instant message. Streaming on demand. Same-day shipping. Our culture doesn’t like to wait. And there’s little reason to bother with waiting these days—if your current provider can’t do it now, someone else probably can. Porn is the fast-food variety of sex. It’s right there, a ready-made,…
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Secrets and Shame: Why we need to confess our porn struggles to others
“Everyone needs to write their stronghold down on a piece of paper and give it to your accountability partner.” My blood started to boil, and I set my jaw. Never before had I been more aware of my rights. You can’t make me do this, I thought. You can’t make me tell you…
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Your Daughter Struggles With Lust: What She Needs to Hear from You
In today’s sex-saturated world, purity is a daily battle that begins early in our lives. And if you have a teenage daughter, she’s in that battle right now. Sadly, a Christian young woman may be losing the fight where it first begins—her thought life. She may not be in a relationship,…
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It’s Never Too Late to Quit Porn: Crystal’s Freedom Story
Go ahead and imagine yourself at the age of 10. Can you see yourself? Imagine for a moment that you are back in time as your 10-year-old self. What do you remember as your favorite thing to do? Playing outside? Having sleepovers with friends? For this 10-year-old, one of her…