by Veronica Benton
I am often asked, “When will I trust my husband again?” This is such a hard question to answer, especially for a woman who just found out her husband has been hiding a pornography addiction.
Trying to find herself in the shock of the moment and not seeing a light at then end of the tunnel is such a scary place.
I knew my husband was having an “affair with our computer” for a long time: the first year and a half of our marriage, to be exact. The problem was that I thought it was my fault. I thought I was not fulfilling my husband, so he would have to turn to the Internet. It was so hard to muster up the courage to call him out, but I knew I had to do something. I had fallen into an eating disorder, partly to have control of something in my life and because I felt that if I could look like the girls online, he would pick me over them. On top of that, we were leading worship at our church, wearing perfect masks, telling no one of our struggles. I had exhausted my efforts and had enough. He snuck into bed around 4am one night and I said, “I know what you’re doing.”
Let the recovery begin.
Thankfully, T wanted to change and was truly sorry. I am heartbroken on the road when I talk to women who tell me their husband says, “The only problem with me looking at porn is your jealousy problem.” Ouch.
One of the biggest factors in rebuilding trust in our marriage is accountability. We signed up with accountability software and the first two weeks in, I got his report in my email and realized it works. I had to call him out again, and told him this was his Get-Out-of-Jail-Free card. If it happened again, the Internet would be gone for good. Every time I get a “clean” report, it helps to build trust.
We always tell people that addiction is addiction, everyone just has their drug of choice. Porn happened to be T’s hardest habit to break. Now, had he secretly been addicted to cocaine, yes, I’m sure I’d have been devastated, but secret sexual sin personally affects the spouse in such a deep way. I know his addiction wasn’t my fault. It took a long time to learn that.
If you’re reading this and think your spouse’s addiction is your fault, please understand it is not. There is nothing you could have done or said differently to prevent the addiction. Trust me, I tried. I tried for a year and a half. Through marriage we become one, especially in our most intimate times. So in my mind, he was turning away from me, unfulfilled, which left me so offended and so disgusted. Once I truly grasped that his addiction wasn’t my fault, I was really able to take “me” out of the equation and we were able to focus on him and his recovery.
Through this entire process I learned a lot about my own faith and our marriage. January 19 will be our 9 year wedding anniversary. When we got married I gave my heart to my husband. He wasn’t very gentle with it, and so I took it back. Since that time, T and I have both truly given our hearts to Jesus. Truly. As long as Jesus is holding my heart, no one can break it. So really, part of rebuilding trust was trusting Jesus with our hearts.
I think I would be lying if I said I trusted my husband 100%. We as humans are imperfect beings; unfortunately, we let each other down. T and I have chosen to grow together and change together. We said, “Till death do we part,” and meant it. I do, however, trust Jesus with my heart, and as long as T and I are fully focused on Him we will always be pointing in the same direction, together. We have taken this addiction and turned it into our ministry. We are daily fighting the battle and daily choosing integrity. If we were in a solitary place, he and I would both be in a recovery group. There is so much healing in knowing you are not alone in your struggle. We are reminded of this daily through emails, texts and talking to people after our shows. It is so amazing to have a couple come up and say, “Thank you, that is our story and it needs to be heard.”
If you are struggling with a hidden addiction, please be honest about it. Get it off your chest by telling someone. Choose integrity daily. Who we are the good, the bad, and the ugly make up our ministry here on earth. Focus on what you are passionate about and use it for Gods purpose. Be the change you want to see, and most of all . . . just love.
. . . .
This is a guest post by Veronica Benton. In 2002, Veronica’s husband Tyler (TD) confessed his ongoing struggle with pornography. Since 2006, T and Veronica have been touring the country with their band, White Collar Sideshow, a group dedicated to helping people break free pornography addiction.
I want to cry… I just want to cry! we are sitting here argueing ab\ doctrine and styles of music that are accepted. Saying they are going to hell when they r doing more to reach out to the enslaved than anyone engaging in religious arguement. They gave up their way of life to serve God, their church home, friends, and fam.. Not many manychristians sacrifice anything anymore. As christians we are suppose
to be encouraging loving, united as one body -Christ’s body. Yet we are’t united we are fighting against each other. How does God’s love shine through that? The light will shine brighter when we unite, wecan reach more people when joined together. We are fighting against a misical culture and not adressing the fact that satan has slithered in and dived us into denominations and and kept us from being more productive for Christ’s cause. We are quick to cast stones in the for form of The Lords Word. We call it love to get ia heated arguement on weather your beliefs are more Holy or theirs. Well it doesn’t matter we believe in the risen Lord and his finished work on the cross. No one is safe apart from his grace. The word says we live by grace daily, it also says our righteousneess is a filthy rags. Tyler, Roni, You,me and everyone else are not going to be more righteouss on our own. We just have to believe as the Word says with faith of a child. And remember on the cross he said, It is finished. Please w
ke up, forgive, and see who the al enemy is. Let God be judge. pray HE either show you the err of your ways or convicts them. He big enough to handle this without our hate and anger costumed in his Word and eloquent speech. Us fighting is just hurting others and turning them from Christ. The World has plenty of hate and anger. This is turning them off of Christ. They are hungry for something different and real the unconditional love and grace of God. God ble
s you.
i generally try to stay out of conversations like these, mainly because i feel it is very hard to speak in love or be able to fully express my point.
i feel like there is great danger in writing off a style of music because of the history it was born out of. many of the hymns that we sing in churches today were Christian lyrics set to drinking songs so people could remember them. i agree with luke that Jesus can redeem any style of music and i know many people that have been introduced to Jesus because of a band’s stance for God. so many people in the world will never walk into a church and we are called to go into all the world to preach the gospel. when our church sends missionaries into the world they learn the language and culture of that people group. it is the same today with rock/metal/hardcore/punk, we need to reach out to these people who so desperately need Jesus but will never walk into a church or listen to hymns. i believe this is who WCS is trying to reach. i had a chance to hear their testimonies at unified underground as well as have conversations with them both. they truly love the Lord and even though some of the imagery might be controversial and thought provoking (and let’s face it, it is) it really made me search my heart and helped me deal with things that i was holding on to that Satan was using to pull me away from Christ.
Christians need to be engaged in culture, not enslaved to it. Romans 12:1-2 tells us we need to be transformed by the renewing of our mind and in Jesus’ last prayer before He was led of to death He prayed for his disciples that they wouldn’t be taken out of the world but they would be protected (john 17:14-19). because of the Holy Spirit’s guidance and the Word of God we have the ability to discern what is God’s will and what isn’t. God is calling us to reach out to the puffed up rockstars and punkrockers and tattooed freaks and those who are trying to build up their image. Jesus hung out with some of the worst of society and loved them all and was able to speak truth into their lives. He went to them, where they were and if we sit back and say i want nothing to do with that style of music because it’s evil or art because it’s controversial then many, many people that need Jesus might never have the opportunity to come into relationship with Him.
All specifics of WCS aside, there are larger disagreements at work here. While I don’t agree with all his views, I think this is a prime example of Richard Niebuhr’s Christ and Culture observations. Niebuhr was commenting on how a perfect Christ can commingle with imperfect human-made cultures. He identifies 5 views of this question:
1. Christ against culture – In this view there is a clear line of separation drawn between the brotherhood of the children of God and the world. Christians are to come out of culture and oppose culture because all culture is infused with sin. This philosophy was seen in monasticism and some branches of fundamentalism a hundred years ago.
2. Christ of culture – In this view, Christians “hail Jesus as the Messiah of their society, the fulfiller of its hopes and aspirations, the perfecter of its true faith, the source of its holiest spirit.” This philosophy might be called “cultural Christianity.”
3. Christ above culture – This views sees culture as neither good nor bad because God sovereignly orders culture, but that we should bring divine law into culture around us in a way that synthesizes Christ and culture.
4. Christ and culture in paradox – This view is like “Christ above culture” except is does not see a possibility of synthesis. Christians are caught in a paradox between responsibility to culture and loyalty to Christ. In culture we see dualism, both sin and grace.
5. Christ the transformer of culture – This view believes Christ can progressively redeem culture. Human culture is fallen, but by God’s grace can be restored as people are redeemed.
While I think there is great overlap in these attitudes, these categories have been very helpful starting points for discussion for Christians over the last 60 years. All five probably find some basis in Scripture in some way.
For some, when they hear different music styles, modes of dress, or certain symbols, these are inseparably linked to a sinful world Christians are commissioned to come out of (Christ against culture). For others, these cultural features are indeed tainted by sin, but when Christ redeems individuals within that culture, Christ can transform old cultural practices to be used for His glory (Christ the transformer of culture). These questions go far beyond WCS.
@Pulled – “New is NOT better”
How so? If you look into the history and the philosophy around in the time of Christ, His ideas were new – they were revolutionary. So to say that the old way is best is inaccurate. If we kept things going using old methods, then the would in it depravity would grow where we would stand still. How can we effectively to minister using trite methods? We need to be revolutionary to reach people. We need to be creative.
Am I saying that we need to break out of the Gospel? Not at all. But the common method, of standing on a street corner telling people that they are going to hell unless they repent, does not work. That is why there is a vast number of people that have build a hatred for Christians. Its not God, Jesus, or the church they hate, its the people.
Maybe my experience is limited to my youth, or the area I live in, but the majority of people that I talk to that are agnostic / atheists have had bad experiences with people that claim to be Christian but do not love. So when you say the old way is best, what are you referring to?
As for rock music:
I listen to metal. Does that make me a sinner? One of my all-time favorite bands have a whole album with lyrics you even will know. Its written from various Psalms, and a few verses from Galatians. Your hymn has some of the same words that I find in my music. Just that mine is to a different styling. So based on the way music is played, am I a sinner?
Also, a number of my friend have come to Christ from the music they listen to. They started to go to church after someone in a rock / metal band prayed for them after a show. So are we sinners because of that? Or how about the senior pastor at my church that listens to punk music? Is he a sinner too? To say that there is only one way music should be is ignorance. We are all individuals, and it is hopeless to hold us all to one expectation. It sounds that you have been throwing a lot of what you have been personally convicted about into the conversation.
Oh, and tattoos….
I believe those images were made evil by man. So again, its a personal thing. As for it saying that it is against Deut. Law, that’s up for debate. If I remember my hebrew (and history) correctly, it was a common things for people to cut themselves and mar their flesh for their god. I dont recall it saying anything about tattoos, that’s the wonder of the English translation. It was another way of the Jewish people separating themselves from the other religions in the area. That and the concept of a loving God. Probably blew a few people’s minds too…
TD, V, I love you both. Cant wait to catch a show again.
Hi Luke, your words are in quotes and my comments follow:
“I don’t for a moment fault you for being confrontational. Christians ought to be when it comes to sin, beginning with God’s own house.”
Amen.
“I’m not trying to debate the relationship between law and gospel here. My main point for you to consider is that having tattoos, for many Christ-honoring people, is not seen as a sin issue in the least.”
Please explain to me how a child of the Light would be drawn to permanently mare himself and others with evil images. Images of monsters, vampires, and the living dead as seen on WCS’s MySpace page?
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewPicture&friendID=85225431&albumId=2492419
This is indefensible. Is a Christian free to do evil? I don’t care what anyone’s view of the Law and Gospel is. It is simple: any person who is lawless is not of God. Any person who does not care about God’s law and holiness is lost and going to hell.
1 John 2:15 Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.
Matthew 7:23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.
Hebrews 12:14 Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord…
The basic idea of holiness includes the idea of separateness from evil.
“2. Seeing the show live, one does not get the impression that Veronica is being presented provocatively…”
Please be honest and real; you use the pronoun “one”; do you speak for everyone? Veronica is a shapely young woman. A thin, tight film of fabric covers her body during the performance of WCS. I can clearly see the shape of her hips and her rear end. Look at the video clips! She wags and struts. Even if this was not arousing it would still be inappropriate. Those curves belong to her husband, Tyler, only. It is foolish, worldly presumption to put Veronica on display like this. Drama or not; this is wrong and indefensible. I am astonished we are having this conversation.
One of the things being missed here is the doctrine of the total depravity of mankind. One reason we have to be modest is because we are fallen.
Here is a free book on modesty that can be downloaded. It is written by a former rock star. it has helped me with this issue:
http://www.mountzion.org/PDFs/cmod.pdf
“I personally love it when the church can use drama to proclaim a message, as long as it is done with skill, honor, and godliness.”
I disagree; drama has no place in Church. Show me drama being used in the New Testament; all you have there is the “foolishness of preaching” being used to call the lost to repentance.
Why do we think we are smarter than God’s Word? Is it not because we have bought into the lie of evolutionary thought; that new is better? New is NOT better. The old path is the safe one. Ours is a sick, twisted, debased, crude, and lost culture. And WCS is poof that the so-called “church” has imbibed this culture, along with the dregs of it.
@Pulled,
Thanks for bringing clarity to your tattoo comments. Before it sounded like you were using the text in Leviticus as your reason why Christians shouldn’t be tattooed at all. I personally don’t have much of an opinion about a Christian receiving those tattoos in particular (the one’s you pointed out). My question for the person with these tattoos is why they got them. I actually don’t know if these are Tyler’s tattoos.
As I did not see the show as provocative or immodest, nor have I talked with anyone who has before talking to you, I’d have to think more about what you are saying. I would hate for us to continue to support a group that was blatantly immodest in their approaches. After watching through more of their videos, I still fail to see where she is presented immodestly, but I’ll keep looking. Thanks for the ebook on modesty. I’m sure it will come in handy.
I think you and I will have to agree to disagree about the use of drama among God’s people. It’s one thing to talk about drama being used at the expense of preaching the Word; its another thing to think God’s people shouldn’t be involved in drama at all.
What a degraded, confusing age we live in.
SG churches come in all flavors, to be sure; many have become antinomian. Most I would not attend. Few I would join.
I have never seen this site before. If the music has a blues beat, I will not listen to it. I am done with it. I have been delivered from it.
Here is Hymn we read just last night from the Gadsby, I doubt the site you referenced has anything like it:
#531
1 Beloved of the Lord most high,
Let praises be your sweet employ;
Ye sons of God, rejoice, and sing
The honours of your Lord and King.
2 Your heavenly Father ever lives,
And all his choicest treasure gives
To you, the favourites of his heart,
Nor will he ever with you part.
3 [Whatever be your lot below,
Though you through gloomy paths may go,
Your heavenly Father is your Light,
And he will guide your footsteps right.]
4 In every changing scene below,
’Tis yours by faith this grace to know:
Now are we sons and heirs of God,
Fast hastening to our blest abode.
5 In every trying, deep distress,
In poverty and wretchedness,
This truth sweet comfort should afford:
E’en now we are the sons of God.
6 Let worldlings know we scorn the toys
Which they so highly love and prize;
We must possess all real good,
Since we are sons and heirs of God.
7 Dear Father, bless us with this grace,
While travelling through this wilderness;
Our sonship still to keep in view,
And honour thee in all we do.
@Pulled – Thanks for the hymn lyrics. l love the verse that reads: “In every trying, deep distress, in poverty and wretchedness, this truth sweet comfort should afford: E’en now we are the sons of God.” Beautifully written.
Please understand, I love hymns. Few songs compare with the richness of many Christian hymns. I sing them every Sunday with my church family. I just also like other lyrical and rhythmic styles as well. Perhaps I just don’t understand why a “blues beat” is so intricately tied to sin in your mind.
Thanks, Luke. Sovereign Grace when I am able to.
I hope to have a reply posted later today.
Thanks, Pulled from the Fire. A quick question for you: I was a bit surprised when you said you attend a Sovereign Grace church given your very strong convictions regarding Christian music. Don’t get me wrong, I personally love a lot of Sovereign Grace music, but I would not have expected someone with your convictions to affiliate yourself with a church movement that produces it own line of “rock” music. Just so I understand where you are coming from, what are your thoughts on Sovereign Grace Music?
Luke, please tell me what kind of Church you attend.
@Pulled from the Fire,
I am a member of an Evangelical Presbyterian Church (that’s the denomination, at least). What sort of church do you attend?
Hi Luke and All,
Thanks for the prayer “Eddies thigh”, I do indeed need it.
First, I admit that parts of my first post were rash. Upon some self examination I see that I did not find the image provocative, “just” horrifying. So I apologize for not being more honest and careful, and for being angry, and thus rash. I was lashing out. Please forgive me. My second post may have made it seem like I was stumbled as well, again I am sorry for this. What I meant was that the modern church has stumbled me with its humanistic psychology, and in other areas, not just music.
Also, to be clear about a point in that first post: I assume that all Christians know that they belong in hell. I belong in the deepest part, apart from the grace of God, even this very moment.
Many on this thread have said that I have been unloving and judgmental. To them I would say; please consider the following.
Human love is common to all, and is indulgent. We are indulgent with each other because we deeply desire to be liked and reinforced. This is related to “the fear of man” and it is a snare (Prov 25:29).
Christian love is always related to the truth, and is therefore often confrontational and unpopular. A Holy Spirit ministry is a convicting ministry. Have a look at these:
John 16:8 And when he is come (the Holy Spirit), he will reprove the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment:
John 7:7 The world cannot hate you; but me it hateth, because I testify of it, that the works thereof are evil.
Ephesians 5:11 And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.
Luke 6:26 Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you! for so did their fathers to the false prophets.
Acts 24:25 And as he (Paul) reasoned of righteousness, temperance, and judgment to come, Felix trembled, and answered, Go thy way for this time; when I have a convenient season, I will call for thee.
So, in light of the above, I hope you can see love in my concern.
Luke wrote: “You said “any man who would delight in his costumed image being tattooed on another person’s body is in a low state of grace.” Why? I really want to know why you think that.”
A person is in a low state of grace (or not a believer) to the degree that he is able to ignore God’s Word with little pain of conscience. So for several reasons it seems that any man who delights in his costumed image being tattooed on another person’s body is in a low state of grace.
1. God, in His Word, forbids His people from tattooing themselves (Lev 19:28).
2. As well, is not a state of Grace being set free from the World System, the flesh, and the devil to worship the living God in Spirit and Truth? So what is with the image of the Ring Leader? How does he relate to Christ? Does he not rather relate to the world, eye candy, and pride?
1 John 2:16 For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.
I don’t know if the following passage applies perfectly to the issue at hand, but I find it interesting, and hope that you will read it: Romans 1:21-25
The article above is about rebuilding trust in marriages damaged by porn. I would like to comment on marriage and the example put forth by WCS.
I have come to understand that marriage is serious because it reflects the relationship between Christ and the Church.
One of my concerns with WCS is that a husband has his wife (who is young and good looking) on stage in a tight dress, dancing in a go-go cage with a guitar. Whether this symbolism is profound or not is not the point. What is clear to me is that this is not what a good husband would do BECAUSE this is not how Christ treats the Church.
Christ protects His Church; He covers her. He supplies all her needs; He does not publicly display her to make an ugly statement. I therefore don’t think Veronica will ever be able to give herself to her husband as she should, in trust and obedience, until WCS is disbanded.
I am concerned for you all. I don’t want you to suffer what I have suffered. I believed the “Church” when it said I could play and be saved. Granted I wanted to believe the lie, but I was encouraged to do so. Now I am old and have lost many opportunities to serve my dear Lord of Glory. I am also far behind in my sanctification. I am also scarred in conscience and in the eyes of my community and family. To be an old fool is a very shameful thing. Do you really think the World is impressed with us? I tell you that the Glory and Holiness of Christ is not coming through to this generation. There is no fear of God before their eyes. It looks more like we have given up and are just going to party to the end. I hope you all get to miss my sad experience. Christ refines people He saves, and any one who tells you different is tragically mistaken.
@Pulled from the Fire,
Apology accepted. God knows I’ve been rash before.
I don’t for a moment fault you for being confrontational. Christians ought to be when it comes to sin, beginning with God’s own house.
I don’t know that I would agree that Tyler is ignoring God’s Word, at least in the respects you mentioned.
1. The Law of Moses does forbid tattooing and self-laceration, as you pointed out (Lev 19:28). But I know many godly Christians who have a much different understanding than you have of the applicability of the Law of Moses. The same chapter of Leviticus forbids mating different kinds of animals, planting two kinds of seed in the same field, wearing clothing woven with two different materials, eating meat with blood, and cutting hair on the sides of one’s head and beard, and yet we find many God-fearing Christians with little conviction to obey any of these laws. For some this is because they believe the Law of Moses is no longer applicable to us at all, that Christ has become central to our relationship with Him, and that we follow a new law, the law of Christ. For others this is because they see the tattooing command (and others) as a part of ceremonial law, not moral law, and therefore not applicable for Christians.
I’m not trying to debate the relationship between law and gospel here. My main point for you to consider is that having tattoos, for many Christ-honoring people, is not seen as a sin issue in the least.
2. Seeing the show live, one does not get the impression that Veronica is being presented provocatively (at least to no one else I’ve spoken to who’s seen the show). Just last night my wife was telling me that had Veronica been portrayed in a sexual way on stage she would have had a real problem with us watching the show, but because the entire act was done tastefully my wife was delighted to see WCS using drama and symbolism to present their message.
I agree with all your statements about Christ and the church, I just disagree that Tyler is parading his wife to the world in an immodest or immoral way. Rather they are a family using drama to portray a message, and after their performance they are able to tell their story and pray with hundreds of people one on one about their addictions and temptations. I personally love it when the church can use drama to proclaim a message, as long as it is done with skill, honor, and godliness.
Thoughts?
Hi Luke,
You ask “What private parts am I talking about?”
When I can see more than I would if the person was wearing underwear, I call that seeing private parts.
Luke said: “If this offends you, you can have them take the picture down”.
With this statement it seems like you paint me as the baby who can’t hack the cool stuff. If this is true, then it is typical of the current perversion of Christian Liberty.
What is happening is that we are being desensitized; systematically desensitized to wickedness by the culture we live in, not only to porn, but to all forms of perversion.
Now the “church” is pitching in with the world to kill souls; kill the souls of children who love to party. “They love to party, so let us help them party in the name of Jesus”. It all looks good on paper and in the minds of men; leadership gets the numbers, nickels, and noise it wants to look successful and the kids get to feel safe while they have a big time. Dandy, but be sure that there will be HELL TO PAY for all of this unless people repent.
As far as Tyler’s spiritual condition goes, I agree, only the Lord God knows for sure.
But one thing can be said: any man who would delight in his costumed image being tattooed on another person’s body is in a low state of grace.
Let us look at your three questions for me. They are in quotes with my response following:
“1. In what way did listening to rock music in church make you stumble? Were you sucked back into drug culture as a result of listening to Christian rock?”
What is being missed here is that the world is a satanic system. The idea of neutrality is a myth. Rock music is not a neutral media to be used as we wish. This stuff has power, and it is presumption to play with it. If you have no fear of God concerning evil, but think you are strong enough to handle and use whatever you want, you are the devil’s fool.
I was an insane biker tramp when I was saved; is that why I can’t handle this stuff? Am I too weak; too damaged?
In truth, I know what it feels like to look ugly, mean, and evil: it feels like POWER. Every biker is just an attention hungry rock star; a coward who is not man enough to stand on sheer, unobtrusive character, so he paints himself ugly to keep worldly people impressed.
“2. By “rock music” what do you mean? Do you mean any sort of hard music period? I more thought of WCSS as an experimental drum and bass sort of group, kind of industrial.”
I am over 50 years old. I was a Rock & Roll druggie at 11, a punk rocker at 19, and a renegade biker at 24. After I got saved I fell into all kinds of junk again with Vineyard worship, the 77’s, DA, and on and on. All this junk is the same: it is all about the thrills, it is the same as drugs. Tecno-Drum-Industrial-New-Wave-Alternitive… whatever. Let’s get real. Christians delight in truth, they don’t need drugs or bombastic music bombarding them to float a buzz. The truth of the Cross is enough to sustain the true Christian in this life and for all eternity.
“3. Isn’t every style of music rooted in some human culture? Aren’t those cultures rife with their own commonplace and demonstrative sins?…”
While it was no golden age would you dare to compare the age of the Puritans to our own?! Look at the music and art that came from that period. Compare their Bible version to ours. Have some faith! Listen to the hymns written in the 1600’s and tell me that these hymns were cut out of the same piece of wood as any CCM or Hosanna, Maranatha, and Vineyard junk if you can. It is not so! God has not left us alone in regards to music.
“3cont. In your opinion is it at all possible that Christ could redeem a style or flavor of music that has traditionally or culturally been associated with the promotion of evil behavior?”
Great question! Let me ask you a few.
1.What is more to the purpose and Glory of God, to save a sinner from his sin or in his sin? See Mat 1:21
2.What is a more powerful witness to the world: to see people doing the same things as they are, or to see people set free to love the things of God?
I know it’s real popular right now to “rock for Jesus”, but one needs to consider: what is it that you see? Is it a new way of speaking that our young people can understand, or is it a deadly, soul damning lie that you don’t have to give up anything to be married to Christ and be reconciled to God?
I am dismayed over the incongruence of an accountability software company’s promotion of a band like WCS. For the last 20 years it seems like every time I went looking for help from the church what I got was a stumble back into a hole.
@Pulled from the Fire,
Thanks for answering some of my questions. They really help me to wrap my mind around where you are coming from.
First, when I said, “If this offends you, you can have them take the picture down,” I am not trying to paint you as “the baby who can’t hack the cool stuff.” I fully admit the picture is, at the very least, bizarre. I personally don’t find it provocative but quirky, and if that means I am desensitized I know I should take a long, hard look at my heart. I will bring this to the attention of other in our ministry and get their feedback as well.
You said “any man who would delight in his costumed image being tattooed on another person’s body is in a low state of grace.” Why? I really want to know why you think that.
I wholeheartedly agree that nothing is neutral. The world is infused with sin. No media is truly neutral because all media comes with a message, a message that points to truth and life, or death and idolatry. I believe all music taps our emotions, regardless of style, and if left unguarded one can always use music to distract (not point to) the truth of the cross and the gospel of Christ. This is wrong, to be sure.
I’m not trying to defend Vineyard, Hosanna, Maranatha, or any other modern music developing industry, especially not over and above any great composers of the past. Personally rock or hard music aren’t my styles at all. I’m merely asking a question: If all music is rooted in sinful human culture, and if every style therefore has the potential to tap sinful emotional responses within us, what makes us think Christian can rightly use any style of music in our communal gatherings? I don’t see a need to pick on rock music in particular. I am a member of a church with a very traditional style of worship, and I know it is just as easy there for me to be distracted from the truth of God by getting lost in the a particular harmony, style, melody, rhythm, or atmosphere.
Personally I believe we can and should use music, and that every style, properly performed with skill, sensitivity, godliness, reverence, and right theology, can be used to move the heart towards truth, the gospel, and Christ as our ultimate source of life and only hope.
The question is whether WCS’s performances and media point people to the gospel or merely to the buzz they get from clanging metal and highly sensory video. Having seen their performance, personally I think they do the former, but maybe you saw them and got a different impression.
Your questions are very good. I really think I agree with many of your presumptions. I agree much of what we see today is Christian “entertainment,” rife with the damning message (implicit or explicit) that becoming a follower of Christ is merely about tacking His name on to your idolatrous life. I agree we must give our entire lives to love Him rightly and to advance the cause of the gospel.
Where I disagree with you is your assessment of WCS’s performance.
I saw them at Ichthus Festival, and their message has changed my life. I’ve never met more genuine people in my life.