Avoiding Porn (Part 2)

Avoid Pornography—It Is a Dangerous Snare

There is a common saying which suggests that “a little peek won’t hurt.” If you believe that, there are many movies, porn producers, and women who will give you a whole lot to peek at. Here again, the Bible is not silent. The Word of God exhorts us to discipline our minds and regard immodest women as different from our modest sisters. Solomon instructs: “As a ring of gold in a swine’s snout so is a beautiful woman who lacks discretion” (Proverbs 11:22). This means that instead of lusting over immodest, seductive women, you must view them like ornaments intentionally displayed in a grotesque way.

Be convinced, since God said this, He will enable you to do it. You can overcome the temptation to peek at scantily dressed and nude women by knowing that they are not eye candy, but rather soul poison. Also, know that if you don’t discipline your mind to think of them biblically, as dangerous goods, Proverbs 7:24–27 warns that immodest women will ensnare you in a deadly trap. If the truth be told and our secret sex wars exposed, we’d find that there are far too many Christians stuck in that trap.

Avoid Pornography—It Is Committing Visual Fornication or Adultery

Perhaps the clincher in flawed thinking is that in order to justify looking at what we know we shouldn’t look at, we tell ourselves that “it’s only looking.” That type of thinking comes from allowing our sinful desires to govern our thoughts. At that point we are embracing a Hugh Hefner-like pagan worldview, which excuses and even promotes looking at nude women. But God is the Master Architect who fashioned all the shapes and curves of a woman’s nude body. Therefore, He alone is the One who determines if only looking really is only looking and if that is okay.

To that point the Bible explicitly teaches that you cannot separate those two acts. Jesus made it real plain. He equated looking with lust to committing adultery (Matthew 5:27). Therefore, know that when you choose to look at women pornographically, you train your mind to believe Satan’s lie and to deny God’s truth that you have taken the first step in committing sexual sin. At this point you’ve bitten the hook and can’t free yourself as you might have thought. God placed within us powerful sexual urges, which when aroused, burst forth and drive us with a desire to complete the act.

That is why most men who watch pornography also masturbate. Pornography is like a gateway drug. It leads you down a slippery slope into all sorts of other perversions of God’s ideal purpose for sex. Don’t be deceived. Looking at pornography isn’t only looking. It is engaging in visual and illicit sex, which often leads to a desire to fulfill inflamed, unsanctioned passions.

Avoid Pornography—It Distorts Our View of God and His Gift of Sex

Another self-destructive, flawed way of thinking about sex is that it is okay to look at women to whom you are not married. Celebrating celibacy for singles, monogamy for married couples, and heterosexual marriages seems a bit outdated in our age of tolerance—even among some professing Christians. There can only be one individual behind a campaign to portray biblical views as outdated and prudish—Satan. He markets lies in order to get you to put down the one weapon that you can use to defeat him—your Sword.

Satan wants you to forego your commitment to follow God’s ways so that he can lure you into following his road to destruction. He does this by painting a false caricature of God as an old sexual scrooge, and then he promotes himself as the hero who brings us “the good life.” You have to see through these lies and know that nothing Satan promotes as good is actually good. Remember, he is the one who told Eve that eating from the wrong tree was a good thing to do.

The so-called good life that he promotes is a slippery slope that leads to deeper sin. He tries to lure you in with visual promiscuity (pornography), arouse you with audio promiscuity (phone sex), enslave you with physical indulgence (fornication and adultery), and destroy you with dangerous and illegal sex. Having a clear biblical direction is the only way to guard yourself against the schemes of the Devil.

In contradiction to his lies about the Word of God, the Bible openly affirms that God’s purpose for nudity is to give exhilarating joy through marital sex (Proverbs 5:18–19). God, who created everything seen and unseen, didn’t declare that His creation was “very good” until He finished shaping a very beautiful, curvaceous woman. Then God brought a naked, very good-looking, Eve to her mate, Adam. He joined them in holy matrimony and blessed them to enjoy a one flesh sexual union (Genesis 2:21–24). God considered that act to be perfectly good and innocent because Genesis 2:25 proclaims, “And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.” It is clear from Scripture that God blesses couples who passionately enjoy their nudity within a marriage union (Song of Solomon 4:10–5:1). God is the giver of all good gifts! Satan perverts them.

Avoid Pornography—It Is One of Satan’s Alternatives to Marriage

A flawed battle plan won’t encourage you to be honest. If you engage in pornography, acknowledge what God says about what you are doing. You do so to enjoy illicit sex. If that is true (and according to Jesus it is), you have only a few options that will please God. First, you have to stop sinning. I won’t belabor that point here. It will be thoroughly covered throughout this book. But it doesn’t matter one bit that all day long there are women who want to expose themselves to you on the Internet, on the job, at your school, or virtually wherever you may be. You must rely on the grace that God gives you to resist the temptation.

Second, you have to fix your marriage bed. In other words, you have to learn to lead your marriage in such a way that you experience the full blessing of oneness with your wife. As the spiritual leader, you must take the steps to make sure that happens. Arrange for you and your spouse to get marital counseling. Find a good Christian marriage conference. As a couple, work through good books on Christian marriage that will provide you with healthy ways to address problem areas. But whatever you do, stop turning to Satan’s pornographic ways to spice up or even replace intimacy with your wife.

Third, if you are single and struggling with sexual immorality of any kind, let me suggest one simple solution. I trust that you will gain many more throughout this book. Get a marriage bed. Discipline yourself for godliness, and prepare yourself to be a spiritual leader and a provider. Then go out and find a godly Christian wife (Proverbs 18:22; 1 Corinthians 7:1–3, 8–9).

Go back to Part 1

Read Part 3 . . .

(This series of posts is adapted from Secret Sex Wars, by Pastor Bobby Scott.)